The Parent Trap
by disenchantedlife
Summary: A remake of the classic, The Parent Trap staring our own boys Dylan and Cole Zack and Cody. Please read AN at the end of chapters. Lemon/Twincest ZackxCody. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters. I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

Within southern Maine, a caravan of three camp buses with the name Camp Walden for Boys emblazoned on their sides climbed a tree-lined road. The Buses turned down a narrow lane and passed through a freshly painted wooden gate. Up ahead was a sweeping view of beautiful Camp Walden. A magnificent lake sparkled in the distance with red canoes lined up on its shores. Over the quiet serenity the bus horns honked to announce the first day of camp had officially begun.

Boys. Boys. Boys. Tall ones, short ones and everything in between. Some carrying pillows, others carrying sports equipment, all wearing backpacks. Teenage counselors ran around trying to control the pandemonium without much luck. The only women in sight, the bus drivers, tossed duffel bags out of the buses and into a large pile while the men of the camp scrambled to sort the bags between the campers.

Marvin Kulp, the owner of the camp, late sixties, four and a half feet tall, wearing khaki shorts, spoke through a bullhorn. Next to him stood his son and first lieutenant, Marvin Jr., just under six feet, tanned and humorless. He also held a bullhorn. "Good morning, gentlemen and welcome to Camp Walden. I'm Marvin, your Camp Director and this is my son and right hand man, Marvin, Jr. Boys, please find your duffels as quickly as possible, we've got a big, big day ahead of us. Marvin,'bunk assignments, if you please."

Marvin Jr. lifted his bullhorn and started barking out bunk assignments right into his father's ear. Marvin Sr. covered his ears in pain. "Ken, Iroquois, bunk seven! Larry, Chickasaw, bunk five!" a few boys high fived. "Darry, Kickapoos, bunk three!"

A mountain of duffel bags sat on the quad as one thirteen year-old, Zackary Martin, popped up from behind the huge pile. "Okay, found my duffel, now the question is, how do I get it out?" Zack spoke to himself. He wore overalls, a baseball cap that said Boys Rule, sunglasses, and a sweat-shirt tied around his waist. His left ear was pierced, his hair is short, and he wore bright red high top converse. "Okay, I can do it." Zack pulled on the strap with all his might, his face turning bright red. "Okay, no I can't."

A skinny kid with a long neck named Zoe, stepped in, carrying his duffel bag on his shoulder and chewing gum loudly. "You must be new."

"How can you tell?"

"You didn't know to grab your duffel before the apes tossed it into the heap. I would say you need some serious help."

"Thanks. It's the big blue one." Zack pointed to the pile. The two pulled on the straps of the bag.

"Cool hat." Zoe pointed out.

"Thanks, it was a going away gift from my Dad."

As Zoe and Zack pulled on the strap together, the bus drivers tossed another half-dozen new duffels onto the pile. Zack and Zoe shot the bus drivers a look. Just then, Nick, a strapping twelve year-old in a tie-dye T-shirt, beads and a bandana around his head arrived and easily pulled his duffel from the center of the pile.

"Now that's my kind of man." Zack laughed.

Zoe cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted, "Hey! Tie-Dye dude!"

Nick turned around and looked at the boys behind him.

"Would you mind giving me a hand? My duffells the blue one, way in there." Zack asked as polite as he could.

Nick nodded and dropped his duffel, landing it right on Zoe's foot.

"You okay?" Zack asked.

Zoe grabbed his foot and hopped up and down. "That would be negative."Nick yanked Zack's duffel out of the pile and dropped it on Zoe's other foot. "Aaaaaahhhh! Why, thank you."

"You're welcome." Nick smiled and read the name-tag on Zack's duffel. "Hey, you're from California?"

Zoe seemed to have forgotten about the pain on his feet and turned back to Zack. "You are? Do you live in Hollywood?"

"Do you like live next door to a movie star?" "

What are you two, Lucy and Ethel?" Zack said sarcastically. "I've never even been to Hollywood. I live in Napa, that's in Northern California, and I live next door to a vineyard."

"A whatyard?" Zoe piped up again.

Zack sighed. "A vineyard. It's where you grow grapes to make wine. That's what we do, me and my dad, we own a vineyard. What bunk are you guys in?"

Zoe and Nick answered at the same time. "Arapaho." neither one seemed to be too thrilled.

Marvin Jr. yelled from his bullhorn. "Martin, Zack..."

"Yo! Right here!"

Marvin Jr. looked over and waved. "Arapaho! Bunk eleven!" The boys slapped hands and headed off toward their bunk.

"So, either of you by any chance know how to play poker?" Zack questioned. The two boys shook their heads. "No? That's a shame. So, tell me, how much cash did you guys bring with you this summer?"

As the boys walked off, a limousine pulled up in front of the main lodge. Heads turned as the driver, in a dark suit and cap, hopped out and opened the limousine's back door. Out stepped a proper British butler, perfect posture, elegant gray suit, extremely proper demeanor. His name is Martin and he spoke with a stuffy English accent. Martin leaned into the back-seat and took the hand of an elegantly dressed thirteen year-old, Cody Sprouse. Cody wore a powder blue suit and carried a satchel and a small vanity case. His hair was perfectly neat, shoulder length and a beautiful blonde. As Cody turned to Martin, the resemblance to Zack was amazing. Same hair color, same eyes, same nose, same mouth, same height, same weight. Identical in every way.

Marty cleared his throat. "Well, here we are - Camp Walden For Boys." he looked around with disdain. "We traveled six thousand miles for... this?"

Cody looked around. He also spoke with a British accent. "It's rather picturesque, wouldn't you say?"

"I don't know if that's precisely the term I would use." Cody smiled as the Limo Driver lined up four pieces of matching luggage by Marty's side.

"So, lets review, your Mother's list, shall we?" he pulled out a typed list. "Vitamins?"

"Check."

"Minerals?"

"Check."

"List of daily intake of fruits and vegetables?"

"Check. Check." Marty looked up. "Check for fruits, check for vegetables. Go on."

"Herbal teas, sugarless candy, sun block, lip balm, insect repellent, umbrella, stationary, stamps, fountain pen, flashlight, batteries, photos of your mother, grandfather and of course..." he turned the page. "Yours truly!"

"Got it all, I think."

"Oh, and here's a little something from your Grandfather, a brand new deck of cards. Maybe you'll find someone on this continent who can actually whip your tush at poker."

"I doubt it but thanks. And thanks for bringing me, Marty."

Marty was suddenly overwhelmed with emotion. He looked away, about to burst into tears, quickly grabbed Cody, hugged him tightly, then just as quickly – regained his dignity. "And remember, if you change your mind and want me to pick you up at the end of camp, I'm only a phone-call away."

"I'll be fine. See you in eight weeks, Marty ol' pal."

"Eight weeks it is, Prince of my Heart. Cody put out his hand, Martin placing his hand over Cody's and they proceeded to do an extravagantly worked out secret handshake - with all kinds of moves in it including a butt bump, a wave under the chin and a shimmy to-and-fro. When it was over, Martin resumed his proper Butler demeanor and got into the Limo.

As the Limopulled away, Marvin Jr. called out on his bullhorn. "Cody Sprouse."

"Yes, hello. I apologize if I'm late. My plane was fogged in leaving Heathrow. You know how London is in June."

"Can't say that I do. Never been to jolly Ol' England but never-the-less, sir, welcome to the U.S. of A. and what we like to think of as the most beautiful spot on God's green earth - Camp Walden." Marvin Jr. in hailed deeply. "Oh, jeez, a bug flew up my nose." he blew into his hands and swatted at the bugs around him.

"Are you all right?" Cody asked.

"Oh sure. Just one of the hazards of camp life. You have a little shnoz ... you'll be fine." he pointed to his own nose. "With this honker, you got problems." he looked down at the boys luggage. "Okey-dokey, let's get this show on the road."

"Can you manage?"

"Manage? Uh, sure... Suppose I can... Why not?" Marvin Jr. awkwardly gathered up all of Cody's luggage and lead him toward his bunk. "I know this sounds weird, but ... have we met before?" Marvin accidentally stepped in a gopher hole and stumbled forward...

"Met before? No, no, I don't think so." he reached out and caught Marvin. "I'm positive I'd remember you."

Marvin Jr., huffed and puffed, leading Cody up the steps to his cabin. "Showers are to your right. Rec room's to your left. Mess hall's straight ahead. Chow's at seven, twelve-fifteen and six thirty. Father gives five demerits for being tardy, so don't be." Marvin Jr. held the screen door open with his leg as he balanced Cody's suitcases under his arms. "Welcome to the Navajos." Eight cots with seven boys unpacking and getting into their uniforms. Cody and Marvin Jr. entered the cabin. "New arrival, boys. Name's Sprouse." Marvin Jr. said.

A cherubic-looking Black boy, Jackie, his hair in corn rows, looked up from his Game Boy. "Your name's Sprouse?"

"Cody Sprouse. Just arrived from London, England." he dropped Cody's luggage. "First time in the country, I believe, right, Code?"

"Yes, sir, just arrived this morning, which is actually tonight for me, which makes this tomorrow morning, which..." he looked around and noticed everyone watching him. "Makes me a ' bit jet-lagged." he walked over to an empty cot. "This one mine?"

"Yep. Has to be made every morning right after reveille. Father's a stickler for neatness, so remember to police your area daily. Now, change into your uniform, Sprouse, chow's at thirteen hundred, and Father gives five demerits..."

"-for being-tardy." Cody stopped him short. "I remember." Crosby, a freckled camper, with a CD Walkman around his neck, caught Cody's eye and smiled.

"But thank you for reminding me, Sir." Cody smiled.

"Quite welcome, Sprouse." he began walking toward the door and leaving. "Introduce yourself, boys. Be sociable." Marvin tripped over a sneaker on his way out. The boys held in their laughter as he banged his head on the door frame. As soon as he was gone, the boys cracked up.

"How scary is it that that man's in charge?" Crosby spoke.

Twenty minutes later, a hundred and fifty boys, all in camp uniforms, arrived for dinner. Two lines of boys approached a central buffet table. In one line, was Zack. In the other line, headed right toward him, was Cody. Both Cody and Zack were busy talking to their friends and didn't notice each other. As Cody reaches the front of the line and approached the buffet table, Zack did the same. For a split second, they stood directly next to each other. Just as they were about to see each other, Marvin, Sr. stepped between them with a plate full of food.

"Excuse me, boys ... I've just got to have a scoop of those gorgeous strawberries." he held a large spoon full of strawberries and turned to Zack.

"Care for some?"

"Oh, no thanks, can't, I'm allergic." Zack took his plate and moved off.

Marvin Sr. turned to Cody on his other side. "How bout you, son? Strawberries?"

Cody began walking away as he spoke. "Sorry, wish I could but I'm allergic."

He looked confused and looked back to his other side in the direction Zack walked off. "Oh, yes, allergic, you just told me that." he paused before speaking again. "How'd you get over there? Oh, well, first day of camp... You'll have to excuse the ol' man. At least I'm not putting salt in the sugar shakers yet. I mean, sugar in the..." he turned back to Cody who was now gone. "Now, where'd he go?"

Later that evening, Zack entered a shower stall and began washing his hair. He wore a small gold locket around his neck. A beat later, Cody entered the stall next to him and turned on the water. He wore an identical locket. The boys can not see each other over the partition. Zack dropped his soap and it slid into Cody's stall. Cody reached over the partition and handed the soap back to Zack.

"Here you go."

"Got it! Thanks." As their fingers touched, they both stood frozen for a moment... a current of some sort running between them. They each turned and looked at their touching hands, then they both let go. Zack lifted his locket, sucking on it, Cody doing the exact same thing as he turned off the water...

The following day, two boys, each wearing nylon jackets and wire-mesh masks were in the middle of a duel. The first boy is whipping the second's butt, knocking his sword out of his hand and pinning him against the wall. The other campers applauded and cheered. Both boys took off their masks and Zack was the victor.

"Touche! Excellent, boys." Marvin Jr. clapped before raising Zack's arm. "The winner and still undefeated champ, Zackary Martin!"

Zack took a bow and moved off to the side with his friends. Cody, Crosby and Jackie passed by in time to hear Marvin Jr. speak up to them and the others around.

"Do we have any challengers?"

Cody pulled on a mask. "Sure. I'll take a whack at it." he snapped on a vest, flipped the sword into the air and caught it, then nodded to Marvin Jr. Marvin blew his whistle.

"En garde!"

Zack, still in his mask, turned to see Cody in his mask and vest. Cody saluted briskly with his sword. Zack hesitated, then did the same. They stood on guard... looking like bookends. Marvin, Jr. blows the whistle again and the duel began. Zack lunged, Cody parried, then attacked. Zack tried to knock the sword out of Cody's hand but Cody deflected the blade, whirled around and lunged. Point for Cody! Zack got the jump on Cody and came in low. Point! Zack lunged but Cody caught his sword and swept it in a full circle pulling them together, mask-to-mask. They broke. Zack charged but Cody side-stepped and Zack ran past him. Zack stopped and whipped around to find Cody lunging toward him...Zack stepped back, lost his balance and fell butt-first into a water trough, landing with a huge splash.

The Campers explode with laughter. Cody reached out to help Zack but he grabbed Cody by the hand and yanked him into the trough. The campers crack-up as the two boys sat soaking, side-by-side. They climbed out together and angrily pulled off their masks. Cody tossed his long hair as Zack shook his short hair dry.

Marvin Jr. spoke up again. "Looks like we got ourselves a new camp champ. Mr. Cody Sprouse! Let's shake hands, boys." Neither boy turned around. "Boys!"

Cody and Zack turned, hands extended. And for the first time, they looked into each others face and froze. Speechless and like looking into a mirror, Zack extended his hand...and Cody reached for it.

- - **Okay, chapter one. It is EXACTALLY like the Parent Trap with Lindsay Lohan... (whom I'm not too fond of...) and they're all boys... (I've NEVER seen a boy parent trap? Sooo...) Sorry if it sucks but for you twincest lovers out there...there's gonna be sexxx ;) hehehe... Just have to figure out how to fit that in! Oh and BTW I just couldn't think of a last name for Cody and I don't think they give Carey's maiden name...so...I just went with Sprouse. :)**

**Side note! sorry had to edit this, some reason it was all SMASHED together... D: reread it! lol jkjkjklololol  
**


	2. Chapter 2

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters! I also do not own The Parent Trap!**

As they touched, something electric again passed between them. Zack and Cody looked down at their hands, then up at each other... not knowing what to say. Just then, their friends joined them and they immediately slipped their hands into their pockets at the same time. Their friends stopped in their tracks and looked from Cody to Zack - stunned at the resemblance. The lunch bell rang and everyone else on the lawn ran toward the Mess Hall.

"Why's everyone staring?" Zack asked.

"Don't you see it?" Cody responded.

"See what?"

"The resemblance between us."

"Between you and me? A resemblance? Let me see, turn sideways ..." Cody turned as he was told. "Now the other way..." And so he did. "Well, your eyes are much closer together than mine. Your ears stick out, your teeth are crooked and that nose... well, don't worry, those things can be fixed."

Zoe and Nick laughed.

Crosby spoke up. "Want me to deck him for you?"

"Hold on, I'm not quite finished." Zack smiled. "You want to know the real difference between us?"

"I have class and you don't? Or I know how to fence and you don't? Take your pick." Zack angrily stepped forward but Marvin stepped between them.

"Okay, boys, time to break-up this little love fest. Cody... Zack..." he looked between them and noticed how they looked alike. "I mean, Zack... Cody..."

The lunch bell rang again. Jackie and Crosby pulled Cody away, as Zoe and Nick pulled Zack in the other direction.

"That boy is a major loser." Zoe said.

Nick laughed. "Yeah. Too bad you couldn't look like somebody cooler."

Cody and his friends walked along, their feet shuffling across the ground. "Do we really look as much alike as I think we do?"

Crosby shrugged. "It's just a weird freak of nature." he slapped Cody on the back. "Please accept my condolences."

Cody looked back at Zack, who was smiling softly at him. He quickly turned away and blushed softly. That night in the Navajos cabin, Cody sat at the small round table with a large pile of change, crumpled dollar bills and candy bars. Gathered around was a crowd of boys watching a poker game, Cody, with a Tootsie Pop dangling from the side of his mouth, played with four older boys and was winning big-time.

"Sorry, boys, read 'em and weep." Cody spread out a full house. The older boys groaned and tossed in their hands, as Cody raked in the pot. "So... that's it... no other takers?"

A little kid spoke up. "You've already tooken everybody..."

A crisp five dollar bill floated onto the table, behind it a smiling lookalike. "Not everybody." Zack stood over Cody with a smile on his face.

Zack picked up the deck of cards and skillfully shuffled the deck. He dealt the cards, shuffling, dealing, drawing, bluffing... First Cody raked in the pot... then Zack... then Cody... it's back and forth... until finally the entire pot sits in front of Zack and Cody. Cody was down to his last dollar. Zack tossed in his money.

"Three bucks."

Cody checked his hand... he held a straight. He bit his lip... knowing he's holding a winning hand.

"Tell you what I'm gonna do, since you're almost tapped out... I'll make you a deal. Loser jumps into the lake after the game." Zack smiled.

"Excellent." Cody smirked.

"Nude."

"Even more excellent." Cody flipped his cards over onto the table. "Queen high straight."

Zack spread a full house across the table. "Start unzipping, Princess... full-house."

Cody's bare feet stepped across the cool sand of the night, his camp uniform falling onto the sand behind him. He stepped away from his clothes and began walking to the lake. Huddled on the shore holding lanterns was a group of boys. Zack stood in the center of the group, a content smile on his face.

"That boy's butt looks awfully familiar." Zoe said as he watched Cody walk to the lake. Zack gave him a strange look and cocked an eyebrow in his direction. "It does!"

Cody reached the dock, teeth chattering. He turned back, looking at the boys. Zack and his friends waved. Cody saluted them. Cody's legs gracefully sliced through the water in a perfect dive. He popped up in the water, looking out at the boys but they were gone.

"Shit..." he thought to himself as he hurried across the sand and arrived where his clothes were, but all that was left was his sneakers. "Alright then, let the games begin."

The following day, Zack and his friends trudged home after a hike. They were hot, sweaty and tired. Zack yawned and stretched his arms up in the air. "I'm so tired. I'm crawling back into bed and sleeping until lunch."

Nick stopped and looked up at the roof of their cabin. "That does not seem like a possibility."

"Why not?"

"That's 'why not'." Nick pointed up at the roof where where Zack's eyes followed seeing where every single cot was perched.

"No way." Zack folded his arms.

Later that night, out by the lake, Cody sat by himself on the beach tossing rocks into the water.

"Hey." Zack walked over and sat down beside him.

"Hello..."

"Sorry...about last night...with your clothes and everything."

Cody looked beside him and admired the sympathetic look upon his face. "It's quite alright. I'm sure the cots on the roof was enough payback." they laughed together and placed their hands on the sand, brushing fingers. Another electrical shock ran through their fingers and the duo smiled at each other.

"Let's just keep this between you and me." Zack leaned over and brushed the hair from Cody's face. "Let them continue their little...sprawl." he smiled and stood up. "Whelp! I better get to bed!" Zack walked off leaving the boy to sit there alone once again.

Within the next day or two, the boys continued their duel between the two cabins. The time when inspection came around on the second day though, Cody's cabin was covered in shaving cream, silly string, unknown things and there was a bucket strapped above the door loaded with liquid of some sort.

"Inspection time!" Marvin Sr. stepped up to Cody's cabin and went to open the door.

Zack and the other boys who had pulled such a devious prank against their rivals, noticed Marvin Sr. about to enter the cabin. "No, no! Don't go in there!" Zack ran and blocked the door, noticing the bucket teetering on the door. "One of the boys got sick last night, it's a real mess. Save yourself the aggravation. It's really disgusting."

"Well if someone's sick, son, then I must go in." Marvin Sr. gripped the door handle not noticing the teetering bucket above his head.

Zack's eyes shot up to the bucket then back to Marvin Sr. "No, really, let go of that door. I insist. He's highly contagious."

Cody smirked. "Actually, we're all fine in here. Unless Zachary Martin knows something we don't know. Open the door and come on in, sir."

With that, Marvin Sr. swung open the door, tipping the bucket which is filled with chocolate syrup. Marvin Sr. was instantly covered head-to-toe in chocolate. Marva Jr. screamed, slipped in the syrup and tumbled down the stairs.

Marva Sr. turned to Zack, slowly wiping the syrup from his eyes. "Congratulations, boys ..."

Within moments, Cody and Zack stood side-by-side as Marvin Sr. paced in front of them, holding a towel, still wiping off chocolate. Marva, Jr. stood at his side, also spotted in chocolate. "That little stunt was the most revolting display of hooliganism ever to take place on these hollowed grounds." Marvin Sr. frowned.

"Amen." Marvin Jr. nodded.

"And worst of all, coming from two brothers who should be setting an example for the entire..."

"We're not brothers, sir." Cody spoke up.

Marvin Sr. looked at them.

"We've never even seen each other before." Zack said.

"That's impossible." Marvin Sr. stopped pacing.

"I'm afraid the look-alike thing has been the crux of the problem, Chief." Marvin Jr. said.

"Well, whatever the excuse, I recommend immediate dismissal."

"You're sending us home?" Zack gaped.

"That does somehow say we failed, doesn't it, Dad?" Marvin Jr. scratched his head.

"All right, all right... Let me just think..."

"Uh-oh." Marvin Jr. said under his breath.

The boys both chewed on their lockets, awaiting their fate as Marvin Sr. began pacing the room again.

The two Marvin's led Cody and Zack away from their bunks and up a long winding hill. Zack balanced his duffel bag on his shoulder, as Cody struggled, his full of luggage. The rest of the boys, and I mean, the entire camp, marched in a line behind them. The two Marvin's caught their breath as they led Cody and Zack into a bunk with just two cots and two trunks.

"We've got six weeks left at camp and you two are going to spend every glorious one of them together. You'll eat together, bunk together and do all your activities together. Either you'll find a way to get along or you'll punish yourselves better than I ever could." Marvin Sr. spoke.

"You'll thank us for this, you'll see." Marvin Jr. smiled.

They exited, leaving Zack and Cody alone and maybe possibly worse, with each other, or so everyone else saw it that way. Cody lifted his suitcases onto the bed and neatly started unpacking his things. Zack, on the other hand, flipped open his trunk, unzipped his duffel and shook his things out like he was emptying a bag of potato chips into a bowl.

A sign that read: Isolation Table - Do Not Disturb was above Cody and Zack as they ate at a table in the mess hall. They were separated from the other campers and ate without speaking. Cody ate a well balanced meal while he read a book as Zack munched on a cheeseburger and played his Game Boy. Neither of them looked at each other, only to keep up the appearance that they weren't thrilled that they would be spending the next six weeks, alone, together, with no peeping eyes...

**hehehe. getting close ;)**

**Haha I'm sorry. I think the "butt" thing is funny XD BAHAHA!**

**I'm trying to make it seem like they don't like each other...but they're gonna have this like secret romance and ... well ... you get the point ;)  
**


	3. Chapter 3

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters! I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

It was pouring rain, and the wind was howling as it whipped around the cabins. Within the Isolation Cabin, Zack walked around in flannel p.j.'s and a sweat-shirt. He began pinning up postcards and photos above his cot. Cody, who was in a matching sweater and pants, laid on his bed playing solitaire. Now and then, each took a glance at the other.

"Cody?" Zack walked over and stood, looking at the cards on the bed.

"Yes, Zack?" he looked up and smiled.

"I, umm..." Zack leaned down, planting a kiss on Cody's cheek.

Cody smiled and blushed, sitting up and messing up his solitaire game. "Do you like me?" his arms stretched and wrapped around the boy before him.

"Yeah...I feel this weird... Well, I don't know what it is..."

"That little electric shock we get when we touch?" Cody ran his fingers across the nape of Zack's neck.

"Yes." he shuddered.

Cody smiled and leaned in closer, placing a kiss on his lips, a shock of electricity running through them. Zack smiled against his lookalikes lips and began working them slowly. Zack's hands dipped under Cody's sweater and gently slid it over his head, causing his blonde hair to become messy. The two giggled and began kissing more, enjoying the feeling of the electricity rushing through them. Zack pulled his own sweat-shirt off and ran his tongue across Cody's chest. The boy moaned softly and toyed with Zack's hair. Zack dipped his tongue into Cody's navel before placing kisses along his pants line. Zack slid his fingers into the band on Cody's pants and swiftly pulled them down.

"Those are...cute." Zack smiled and noticed the small underwear he had on.

"They're...um..." Cody blushed and bit his lip as Zack removed them.

Zack grinned at the semi-hard erection and took it in his hand, slowly stroking it. Cody moaned and sucked on his fingers as Zack slid one of his own into Cody's small entrance. He squirmed at the intrusion, but soon relaxed and enjoyed the feeling.

"Are you sure we should be doing this?" Cody watched as Zack removed his own pants, then returned to scissoring him.

"Okay, number one: it's fine, we're old enough. You do know about sex, right? Also, number two: that British accent is sexy..." he smiled and placed a kiss on Cody's neck.

"Of course I know about se-, AH!" he screamed and ripped his nails across Zack's back, biting into his shoulder as Zack thrust himself inside of Cody. He screamed again as Zack pulled back and thrust into Cody once again. "Stop!" he gasped in pain and dug his nails deeper into Zack's back.

"Sorry!" Zack stopped moving and allowed Cody to relax and get used to the large intrusion. "Better?" he asked after a moment or two.

"Much..." Their hips pushed together in smooth motions, pushing and pulling as Zack slid in and out of Cody.

The two locked lips and allowed their mouths to open and their tongues to mingle. Zack could feel himself reaching his breaking point and it was honestly, the best buildup to an orgasm he'd ever had. Cody began kissing Zack's neck as they moved faster, poker cards falling onto the floor and scattering around.

"I'm almost there..." they spoke at the same time, laughing, then returning to the heated moment.

Zack and Cody both groaned and came, Zack inside of Cody and Cody on their stomach's. They relaxed together and smiled, laying on the bed kissing. Neither spoke and after a while, Zack stood up and pulled on his pants. Cody grabbed his pants as well and pulled them on before picking up his cards that were thrown all over and wiping off the ones that were covered with unmentionable fluid. A sudden gust of wind blew the door open, sending Zack's photos flying into the air. Zack screamed and tried to salvage them as Cody rushed to the door to bolt and shut it. Zack found Cody's blanket that he called blankie, laying on the floor and handed it to Cody.

"Thanks. Any of your pictures ruined?"

"Only the beautiful Angalina Jolie."

"Oh, your girlfriend?"

Zack showed him the photo. "Yeah, right." he paused. "You've never heard of her?"

"No."

"How far away is London anyway?"

"From here – six thousand miles. But sometimes, it seems much further. -How far away is your home?"

"California's way at the other end of the country." he picked up a photo and handed it to Cody. "Actually, here's a picture of my house."

"Wow. It's beautiful."

"We've got this incredible porch that wraps around the whole house with rocking chairs and a hammock and stables back thataway...and this great pool with a sliding board..."

"How cool." he pointed to the back of a man. "Who's that?"

"Oh, that's my dad... He didn't know I was taking a picture or he would've turned around. He's kinda like my best friend. We do everything together." Cody shivered and rubbed the goosebumps on his arms. "What's the matter?"

He grabbed his sweater and pulled it on. "It's chilly in here, that's all."

Zack crossed to his trunk and took out a bag of Oreos and saw Cody watching him. "Want one?"

"Sure. I love Oreos. At home, I eat them with peanut butter."

Zack stopped, surprised. "You do? That's so weird. So do I."

"You're kidding? Most people find that totally disgusting."

"I know. I don't get it."

"Me either." The boys laughed and thought about sharing each others company and began laughing even harder. Zack dug a jar of peanut butter from his trunk and opened it and they began eating together.

Zack licked some peanut butter from his fingers. "What's your dad like? I mean, is he the kind of father you can talk to or is he one of those workaholic types that says, 'I'll talk to you later, kid', but never really does? I hate that."

"I don't have a father, actually. I mean, I had one, once, I suppose, but my parents divorced years ago. My mother never even mentions him. It's like he evaporated into thin air or something."

"It's scary the way nobody stays together anymore."

"Tell me about it." Both of the boys devoured their Oreos and peanut butter.

"How old are you?" Zack asked.

Cody spoke with his mouth full. "I'll be fourteen on August 4th."

Zack choked on his mouth full and cleared his throat. "So will I."

"Your birthday's August 4th?" Cody asked, receiving a nod from Zack. "How weird is that?"

"Very." Zack turned and looked out the window. "Hey, it stopped raining. Want to get a Popsicle or something?"

Cody walked up to Zack and looked him up and down, really studying him, biting on his locket. Zack, feeling his eyes on him, played with his necklace.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"Zack, what's your mother like?"

"I never met her. She and my dad split up when I was a baby, maybe even before, I'm not sure. He doesn't like to talk about her...but I know she was really beautiful."

"How do you know that?"

"Because my dad had this old picture of her hidden in his sock drawer and he caught me looking at it all the time so he gave it to me to keep. I'm really thirsty, you sure you don't want to go to the canteen and get something to drink?"

"Will you stop thinking about your stomach at a time like this!"

"At a time like what?"

"Don't you realize what's happening? Don't you find it peculiar that we both look so much alike and have the same birthday and..." he shook his head. "Oh man, this is beyond coincidence, this is beyond imagination! I only have a mother, you only have a father... You've never seen your mom, I've never seen my dad. You have one old picture of your mom, I have one old picture of my dad but at least yours is probably a whole picture." Zack drifted over to his drunk. "Mine's a pathetic little thing, ripped right down the middle... What are you rummaging in your trunk for?"

Zack turned, holding a photo to his chest. "This. It's the picture of my mom. And it's ripped, too."

Cody appeared a little spooked. "Right down the middle?"

Zack nodded nervously. "Right down the middle."

Cody rushed over to his trunk and wildly tossed out his things. He pulled out a small box, opened it and carefully took out his ripped photograph. He walked back to Zack, holding it close to his chest. "This is so freaky. Okay. On the count of three, we'll show them to each other, okay?" At the same time, they counted. One... two... they put their photos together and shouted three. The photos, when placed next to each other, fit perfectly forming one complete photo.

Zack bit his nails. "That's my dad..."

"That is my mom..." The boys stared at the photo, then at each other. A formality of strangeness settled on them. They both reached for their lockets as the lunch bell sounded.

"That's the lunch bell." Cody bit his lip.

"I'm not so hungry anymore. So if your mom is my mom, and my dad is your dad... and we're both born on August 4th, then you and I are... like... brothers."

"Brothers? Zack, we're twins!" frozen, Cody laughed then tears came to his eyes. Zack's eyes filled up soon and tears streaked his cheeks. They put their arms around each other and embraced, sobbing. They pulled apart, looked at each other, smiled and began to laugh.

"So, I just fucked my brother..."

"Guess so." Cody laughed under his breath.

Zack nervously bit his locket.

"What's that locket you're biting?"

"Oh, I got it when I was born. It has my initials "ZM" on it."

Cody showed his as well. "I got mine when I was born, too. Except mine has an "CM" on it...My mother told me that the "M" was my fathers last name..."

"Now I've got goose-bumps." he blinked a few times. "Oh my God. I'm a twin? There's two of me! I mean, two of us? Wow! This is like... I have to sit down." Zack took a seat on Cody's bed.

Cody sat next to him. "I think I'll join you."

They sat for a beat then, "Can I see your toes?"

Cody lifted his feet up onto the bed. "Sure."

Zack lifted his up as well, placing their feet side-by-side. "Identical! Hands?" They held out their hands together. "Oh my God. Exactly the same. Except I bite my nails."

"You should stop. See how nice they could look?" he smiled and flaunted his fingers.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Mint green."

"Oh my God! Oh my God!"

"If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?" Cody asked.

"I don't know. Pizza..."

"Topped with...?"

"Olives, green peppers..."

"And...?"

"Anchovies."

"Oh my God. We are twins!" Cody jumped and hugged Zack.

**haha...So...I guess they're alright with fucking each other? HAH' o.o' :P I don't know how long this is going to be, but we'll wing it and hope for the best ;)**


	4. Chapter 4

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters! I also do not own The Parent Trap!**

It was dinner time in the mess hall, and Cody and Zack sat at their Isolation table, talking a mile-a-minute.

"I don't know what our parents fought about but it must've been pretty dreadful for them to bisect us like this." Cody picked at his food and smiled at his brother.

"I don't know what bisect means, but I can't imagine anyone not getting along with Dad. Everyone loves him."

"I know, same with Mom."

"Tell me about her, what's she like?"

"She's a singer."

"Get out!"

"She sings at the most beautiful weddings and even helps to design some of the gowns. That's her specialty. She's becoming quite famous, actually. A Princess in Greece just bought one of her gowns."

"Wow."

"You know what's interesting – neither of them ever got married again. Has your...my... our dad ever been close to remarrying?"

"Never. He always says I'm the only one he needs in his life."

"Mom's never come close either. You know what this means, don't you?"

"Not exactly. You're obviously the smarter one, you get everything before me. What does it mean?"

Cody leaned in smiling deviously. "Secretly, in their innermost heart of hearts, they must still be in love with each other."

"You think so? Then why haven't they tried to see each other all these years?"

"That's the way true love works. History's filled with stories of lovers parted by some silly misunderstanding. Anyway, mom can be unbelievably stubborn when she wants to be."

"She can't be worse than dad."

Cody laughed. "They sound exactly like us."

"What do you mean?"

"The fact that they're unbelievably stubborn and cant really have a romance."

"Oh."

Late at night, everything was quite and peaceful until Zack bolted straight up in bed. "Oh my God! I have a brilliant beyond brilliant idea." he got out of bed and paced across the floor. "I'm a genius. Cody, wake up, you're related to a bona fied genius!"

"What are you raving about."

"You want to know what dad is like, right?"

"I was just dreaming I was on your front porch with him."

"And I'm dying to know Mom. So what I'm thinking is … Oh man, this is so brilliant, it's scary."

"What is it?"

"I think we should switch places. When camp's over, I leave as you and go back to London and you leave as me and go to California." Cody gave him a strange look. "We can pull it off. We're twins, aren't we?"

"Twins from different countries, with different accents, different hair-styles, different vocabularies... different everything. Zack, we're totally and completely, one hundred percent different."

"So? What's the problem? I'll teach you to be me and you teach me to be you." Zack fell to his knees and begged. "C'mon, I gotta meet my mom."

Cody got out of bed and looked at his brother. "The truth is, you know, if we switch, sooner or later they'll have to un-switch us."

"And when they do, they'll have to meet again."

"Face-to-face. After all these years."

"I told you I'm brilliant."

During the next day, Zack drew on a large pad, the layout of his house. "Okay, dining room's on the right, but we never eat in there except on Thanksgiving and Christmas. Living room's here... Dad's office is the first door down the hall. You never have to knock, if you do, he'll think it's weird... Down here is..." Zack continued showing his brother where everything was located and Cody soon picked up the pad and did the same.

When sunset came, Cody and Zack sat on the dock looking through a stack of photos. "This is Grandfather."

"He's cute, look at his little old man wrinkles, what do we call him?"

"Grandfather."

"That makes sense."

Cody showed the next photo. "This is Martin. He's our butler."

"We have a butler?"

That night, the entire camp was assembled for a screening of Father of The Bride, Part II and, naturally, they're laughing hysterically. Zack and Cody sat in the middle of the crowd, whispering.

"But I never bite my nails!"

"But I always do. Daddy'll know."

Cody sat on his hands. "I can't."

"Want me to do it for you?" Cody rolled his eyes and began chewing his nails.

In the morning at the mess hall, Cody sat in Zack's seat, and Zack sat in Cody's. Zack sipped a cup of tea, very gentlemen-like and Cody munched on Fruit Loops.

Zack spoke with a proper British accent. "I dare say this is frightfully good tea, wouldn't you agree?"

Cody continued playing the Game Boy in front of him. "What-ever."

The walls of their cabin were now covered with charts, photos and diagrams of Cody's London town house and Zack's Napa ranch house. Cody was sitting on a stool in front of a mirror biting his locket. "Okay, I'm ready." Cody heard a draw slide open as Zack grabbed a comb and pair of scissors. Cody closed his eyes as Zack grabbed a clump of his hair, closing his eyes, as well. "Don't shut _your _eyes!"

"Oh, right. Sorry. I'm just a little nervous."

"You're nervous? A thirteen year-old boy is cutting my hair. Go ahead, just do it!" Zack raised the scissors and snipped away at his hair, the clippings falling in a ring around his feet. Cody looked into the mirror at his new "look" and bit his locket again. They were now identical in every way.

"This is scary." Cody said.

"You never looked better." he bent down and kissed his cheek, realizing something. "Oh my God!"

"Oh my God what?"

"My ear is pierced!"

"Yeah...?" he then began to panic. "Oh, no. Forget it! Uh-uh, not happening. Sorry. Wrong number."

"Then cutting your hair was a total waste. There's no way I could go to camp with a pierced ear and come home without it. I mean, come on. Get real."

"This isn't fair. I've had to chew my nails, cut off my hair and now you want to punch holes in my ears! You didn't have to do one bloody thing to become me!"

"Hey, can I help it if I'm a complicated boy with a look entirely my own?" Zack lit a match and held a sewing needle over the flame. He spoke in a calm voice. "Needle sterilized." he professionally carried the needle to Cody, who lied on his bed, petrified, holding an ice cube to his ear.

"Y-Y-You sure you know what you're doing?"

"I've gone with all my friends to have their ears pierced. Just close your eyes, it'll all be over before you know it. Earring ready?" He held up the earring as his reply. "Okay, just relax. On the count of three, remove the ice. One, two, three!" Cody shut his eyes tightly, pulling the ice away as Zack shoved the needle through Cody's ear lobe. Both boys screamed loudly at the top of their lungs.

Cody was now wearing the earring, and gently slapping Zack's face as he was passed out cold on the floor. "Zack, are you okay? Wake up! Zack!"

Zack opened his eyes and blinked a few times. "Are you bleeding to death?"

"I'm fine. It didn't hurt at all, but maybe we should both pierce our other ears?" he smiled, holding up the needle. Zack took one look at the needle and passed out again. "Zack!"

In the main lodge, teary-eyed young campers hugged good-bye as they loaded into the buses and cars. Crosby, Jackie, Zoe and Nick hugged Zack and Cody goodbye and climbed into their buses. Zack was now dressed in Cody's blue suite and Cody was dressed in Zack's overalls.

"Okay, so remember, you're going to find out how mom and dad met..." Cody said.

"And you're gonna find out why they broke up..."

Marvin Jr. turned on his bullhorn and yelled. "Cody Sprouse! Your car's here! Cody Sprouse, front and center!"

"That's you." he handed Zack an envelope. "Here's your ticket and passport. The plane leaves at noon." he smiled. "Also, remember, you've got to figure out a way to bring mom out to California."

"Last call, Cody Sprouse!" They hugged.

"Give dad a hug for me."

"And give mom one for me." Zack nodded and took off, Cody watching him while biting his locket.

"Oh my God, Zack! I mean, Cody! Zack!" Cody bounced over to him as he turned around. "The lockets!"

Zack rolled his eyes, and quickly switched lockets with his brother, kissing him goodbye and taking off again. Cody watched from the crowd as Zack greeted the limo driver, climbed in the back seat and sped off. Cody crossed his arms, then crossed his fingers. "Good luck..." he whispered.

10,000 feet in the air above London, Zack was seated by the window on British Air, just moments before landing. "Okay, this is it. Oh, God, I hope she likes me. Please like me..." Zack bit his lip and looked out the window.

A steady stream of passengers filled the terminal. Zack cautiously entered, looking into the sea of faces waiting behind a velvet rope when he heard a voice shouting.

"Cody!" Zack looked up and saw Martin pushing though the crowd, holding a small thing of flowers.

Zack cleared his throat and spoke with his best British accent. "Maaaw-tin!" he rushed to him and gave him a big hug.

"You look fantastic. What did you do to your hair?"

"Cut it. Do you like it?"

"Love it. It's the new you!" he looked at Zack's ear. "And you got your ear pierced! Give me five!" he put out his hand to start "the handshake". Zack looked at him strangely for a moment, then remembers "the handshake" and executes it to perfection.

Zack sat in the limo and rolled from the airport passing by many sites you would have seen in postcards. He had the window rolled down and his head resting on his hands as he soaked up the sights. "This is so amazing! What a city!"

"Eight weeks at camp and suddenly you act like an American tourist."

"That's what camp's for, silly. Makes you appreciate home. I just love how everyone drives on the wrong side here." he caught himself. "I mean, here they actually drive on the right side, but after being in America where they drive on the wrong side, which after a while begins to feel like the right side, makes this seem like the wrong side... Oh my God! Martin! Buckingham Palace! Can we stop? I'm dying to see one of the guards up close."

"You've seen the guards up close a million times."

"But never with short hair and pierced ears."

"Did they serve you anything funny to drink on that plane?"

"Please, Martin. Just for a sec."

"Just for a sec? Now you're even talking like an American. Oh, dear... Gareth pull over, will you, old boy?" the driver pulled up in front of Buckingham Palace and Zack got out, running up to one of the Royal Guards.

As is the custom, the guard didn't look at Zack or even blink.

Zack waved. "Hi, there. How ya doin'?" no answer. "My name's Zack. I'm from California. We don't have anything remotely like you in California. Oh, this is too cool. My dad has a nutcracker shaped just like you. Same outfit... everything. Is the Queen home? What's she doing? I know you can't answer. Can you blink if she's home?" he whispered to the guard.

Suddenly, the guard clicked his heels, lifted his rifle over his shoulder and snapped to attention. A dozen other guards joined him, doing the same. Immediately, the other side of the gate was flanked by a matched set of guards, all switching their rifles from one shoulder to the other and snapping to attention. The enormous gates to the palace majestically opened and a dozen palace hors holding royal flags exited in formation, followed by a white rolls royce. The rolls slowly pulled through the gates and headed directly toward Zack, who stood frozen among the palace guards.

"Oh jeeze, tell me this isn't happening!" The rolls came to a stop in front of Zack and the tinted window in the backseat slowly lowered. Zack started to fall backwards. The palace guard pushed him back upright. From the backseat, behind the driver, Queen Elizabeth leaned forward and peered out, crown and all.

"Good afternoon." she spoke.

"Good afternoon." Zack said.

"What's your name, dear?"

"Zackary Martin. I mean, Cody Sprouse, ma'am. Not Zackary Martin. Sorry. Forgot my name."

"Yes, I have that effect on people. So nice to meet you, Cody Sprouse. Thank you for stopping by the palace today."

"Thank you, Your Highness. Very nice to meet you personally like this … I didn't even know you were home. I was excited just to see one of your guards … I'm supposed to bow, aren't I?"

"That's okay, my dear, I shan't tell a single soul. I promise."

Zack nodded, stunned. "You shan't? Oh, thank you, ma'am."

The Queen waved with a gloved hand, "Time for me to go. Ta-ta."

Zack waved back, stunned. "Ta-ta..."

The window rises and the rolls pulls off amongst The Queen's Guard.

The palace guard spoke, through locked teeth. "Now that's a first." Zack turned to Martin and the chauffeur, who watched, their mouths agape.


	5. Chapter 5

**I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters! I also do not own The Parent Trap!**

**Quick one, I'm trying to do one chapter a day...  
**

The limousine pulled up to an elegant town house on one of London's loveliest streets. The driver got out, opening the back door for Zack. He stepped out and looked up at the house.

"This is it, 18 Cumberland Square." Zack said to himself.

Martin helped the driver with the luggage as Zack rushed up the steps. He placed his hand on the big round knob and turned it. A beautiful, sun-filled house with a fantastic carved staircase. Zack stood in the foyer, feeling very small.

"Hello?" he peeked into the drawing room, didn't see anyone, headed around the stairs, counting the doorways and stopped at the library where he saw someone sitting in a leather chair, smoking a pipe, hidden behind The Financial Times. Zack spoke softly. "Grandfather, I'm home."

Zack's grandfather, Charles Sprouse, a small, dapper man, with a moustache who wore a Saville Row suit, rose up with a smile. "Is that my little grandson? That tall gangly thing?"

"Yes, it's me."

He took him in his arms. "Did you have a good time?"

"Uh-huh... Great..." he buried his face in his grandfathers jacket.

He smiled, amused. "What are you doing?"

"Just smelling."

"Smelling?"

"I'm making a memory. Years from now, when I'm all grown up, I'll remember my grandfather and how he always smelled of peppermint and pipe tobacco." He pulled him close, while Zack rested his head on his chest. Then, from the top of the stairs he heard a voice.

"Cody...!" Zack looked up to the balcony at the top of the stairs and saw his mother – for the first time in his life. Carey Sprouse was a natural beauty in her mid-thirties.

He walked trance-like to the bottom of the stairs. "Mother?"

"Honey, welcome home!" Carey rushed down the stairs as Zack flew up toward him...

Zack fell into his mother's arms, tears flooding his eyes. "I can't believe it's you."

"And I can't believe it's you and with short hair no less."

"A boy I met at camp cut it. Do you hate it?"

Martin entered with luggage. "I think it looks awesome."

"So do I. I absolutely love it. And you got your ear pierced?" Zack nodded.

"Looks very chic if you ask me, although nobody ever does." his grandfather said.

"Any other surprises – tattoos, tongue rings … ?" Zack laughed, shook his head, looked up at his mother with tears in his eyes. "What is it, sweetie?"

"I'm sorry, it's just... I've missed you so much."

Carey bent down and hugged her son. "Can you believe it? It seems like it's been forever."

"You have no idea."

Moments later, laughter came from Carey's room. The bedroom was beautiful, feminine and gracious. Tea had been laid on a corner table. Carey led Zack to a small love seat.

"So tell me about camp."

"It was great and I liked this one boy a real lot, I mean... in particular. He's from California, actually." he paused. "Have you ever been to California?" Carey began pouring tea. "Yes... Once. But that was a long time ago, before you were born."

Zack looked at Carey. "Man-o-Manichevitz … I didn't realize you were so beautiful."

"Man-o-Manichevitz … I love your new vocabulary."

Just then, Martin knocked on the open door with disdain, holding up a stuffed animal that belonged to Zack. "I found a stowaway in your suitcase."

"Oh my God, Cuppy." Carey turned to him. "It belongs to a boy in my bunk... I don't know how on earth he ended up in my suitcase. Gosh, whaddya know."

"Well, since he's not our 'Cuppy', shall we dispose of him?" Martin said.

Zack jumped up, grabbing it. "No! I mean, no. I'll mail it to him. He loves this thing a lot. A lot. It'd be like me losing, er, blankie... He's like slept with that thing his entire life and he could never be like in a foreign country without him. No, no, I'll take care of it, thank you, Martin." Right as Zack was through talking to Martin, the phone rang and his mother answered it.

"Hello? Hi... Really? Can't you manage without me? Cody just got home from camp... Well, what's the problem?" As she talked on the phone, Zack crossed to the dresser and ran his hand across her things until he came across a photo. The photo was of Carey as a little girl. Zack puts it back and looks at his mom. Carey made a face about the phone call, causing Zack to laugh as Carey continued on the phone. Zack noticed Carey's closet door was open and he entered, gazing at all of his mother's clothes and how they were all designer lables. "Cody!" Zack popped out of the closet, worried he'd been caught trespassing. "Would you mind very much running down to the studio with me?"

Through the long streets of London, through taxi cabs and traffic, Zack was walking the streets, happy as could be, with his arm locked with his mothers. They walked up to a store with mannequins wearing exquisite wedding gowns. Above the window the name of the store said Carey Sprouse Designs and Musical Styling.

"Wow, that's incredible." Zack smiled.

"Really? You don't think it's too over-the-top?"

"No. I love it. You know who would look really beautiful in that gown? I mean, beautiful." he corrected his accent.

"Who?"

"You."

"Me? I think the time change has made you a little loopy. Come on, let's see what all the fuss is about..."

A skylight filled the foyer of the converted town house with a splash of white light. A huge vase of white orchids sat on an antique table. Carey and Zack climbed a circular stairwell, passing a Bridal Boutique on the first floor.

"-You mean you never think about getting married again?"

"No, I like things exactly the way they are, thank you."

An Assistant hurries past them, carrying a veil. "Hi, Carey. Hey Cody, welcome home. Great haircut."

"Hi... Thanks ..." Zack shut his eyes, thinking hard. "Fiona! Yeah, I'm back. Thanks." he turned back to his mother. "But mom, seriously, doesn't designing all these wedding gowns ever make you think about marriage... or maybe just think about the 'F' word?"

Carey stopped. "The 'F' word?"

"My 'father'."

"Oh. That 'F' word. Well, no, actually it doesn't because I didn't even wear a wedding gown-when I married the 'F' word."

"You didn't? -Why not?"

"Hey, how did we get into this discussion anyway?" they arrived at a large loft filled with people. "Okay, here we are. Now let's see what disaster awaits us."

As they stepped into the loft, a photo-shoot was in progress. A model wore a beautiful wedding gown as a photographer shot away. Make-up, hair people and assistants scurried about. Music played in the background and Zack watched like a kid in a candy store, admiring the models.

The photographer spoke. "Okay, she's here. We're saved."

"Uh-huh, the pressure's on." she said mostly to Zack.

"We don't know what to do with the veil. if she wears it, it covers the back of the dress, if she doesn't the dress looks-"

"- incomplete. Right." she turned to the model. "Can you try standing sideways..? Head up, kind of an Audrey Hepburn type... that's it. That's perfect." she turned to the assistant. "Now slip the veil on and drape it back... not over her shoulders … straight back, there you go..." she turned back to the model. "Now lift the train in your arms like you're carrying it. Don't worry about the bouquet, you're married now, you gotta learn to juggle... Beautiful. And look happy, it's your wedding day!" The model laughed as the photographer reeled off shots.

"Mom is too cool..." Zack said to himself.

Carey and Zack made their way down the hall, passing a row of design offices. Two assistants carried a gown past them.

"So what did you wear to marry my Dad?"

"Why the sudden curiosity about your Dad?"

"Well, maybe because he's never mentioned and you can't blame a kid for wondering..."

Carey stuck her head in an office. "I'm going home, kids ... See you tomorrow." they headed back down the circular staircase.

"So, what was he like? Really."

"Who?"

Zack rolled his eyes. They stepped out onto the streets.

"Mother, you can't avoid the subject forever."

"Okay. He was quite lovely to tell you the truth. When we met, he was...actually entirely lovely. All right?"

Zack smiled. "All right."

It began to ran and Carey snapped open an umbrella, wrapping her arm around Zack. "Are you cold?"

"I'm fine." he looked up at her. "So, did you meet him here in London?"

Carey took Zack's hand as they dashed across the street. "We met on the QE 2."

"The QE what?"

"The Queen Elizabeth 2. It's an ocean liner that sails from London to New York. I was nervous about flying in those days, so was your father." she smiled, remembering back. "We met our very first night on board the ship, actually. We were seated next to each other at dinner. He's an American, you know."

"No kidding?"

Carey nodded. "We kind of hit it off immediately."

"Hey, I love Americans. I mean, if I wasn't British, I'd be an American. So, was it love at first sight?"

"I knew you were going to ask me all these questions one day." she waved her hand in the air, yelling. "Taxi!" a cab splashed to a stop and they hurried inside.

Carey and Zack sat side-by-side in the back seat of the cab. "So, did you see each other every single night?"

"You know, this part of your personality reminds me of you father. You'd think he raised you instead of me." she looked into Zack's eyes. "Yes, we saw each other every night, every morning and every hour in-between. Then one night, he popped the question, right there in the middle of the Atlantic."

"Cool."

"And since a ship's Captain can do all kinds of special things, like even marry people..."

"Oh my God, you mean, you got married on the QE 2?" his mother nodded. "That's beyond cool. So what happened? You didn't love each other when you weren't in the middle of the Atlantic?"

"I don't know, honey. These things are complicated. I'm very British and you father's very American. I tried living in California, he tried living in London but..."

"It just didn't work out."

"No, it didn't. Except for having you." Zack smiled as his mother wrapped her arm around him, causing him to sigh.

"Dear old dad. I wonder what he's doing at this very moment?"

**Short one...sry not very exciting. **


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters, I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

Kurt Martin was lovely, indeed. A smiling, ruggedly handsome guy, who shone among a throng of people waiting anxiously at The Napa County Airport.

Suddenly, he brightened and waved. "Zack! Hey, welcome home, kiddo!"

Cody walked across the tarmac carrying Zack's duffel bag over his shoulder. Nervous at first, he broke into a grin at the sight of his father, waving and smiling at him. "Dad!" he ran to him and stopped just as he reached him. He looked up. "Dad... Finally..."

"Get into these arms, you little punk." Kurt wrapped his arms around Cody and pulled him close. "I hope you had a lousy time at that camp 'cause you're never going back – I missed you too much." he looked at Cody as he smiled. "What happened to you? Something's changed. Did you get taller?" they walked off, arm-in-arm, into the terminal, Kurt carrying Zack's duffel.

"So, what's up, Dad? How's Chessy and everybody?"

"Great. Everybody's great, can't wait to see you. Eight weeks really is too long, Zack. So much has been happening around here."

"A lot's happened to me, too. I feel like I'm practically a new man." as they walked, Cody kept peeking at Kurt.

"What's the matter? Did I cut myself shaving?"

"No, it's just seeing you for the first time. I mean, you know... in so long." he giggled. "You look taller to me, too."

Kurt pulled Cody close. "C'mon, squirt, let's go home."

A dark green Suburban drove past picture perfect wine vineyards. Kurt drove wearing a straw cowboy hat with Cody sitting next to him. "Hey, by the way, thanks for all those newsy letters. I'm really glad I bought you all that personalized stationary you just had to have." he said with a mouth full of sarcasm.

"We meant to write, Dad, but we just got so busy with..."

"We?"

"Oh. Me and my friend. I met this boy at camp and we got really close. Practically like brothers. He was a lovely boy."

"'Lovely'? You seem to have gotten very Proper all of a sudden. Not to mention that you just called a boy lovely, is there something I should know about?" he raised an eyebrow, taking Cody's hand. "Still biting those nails."

"I uhm... well, no...I'm only thirteen, Dad. I'm still learning new things, you know that, Dad. And I can't believe you noticed my nails, Dad." he frowned.

"I guess so... Whaddya mean, noticed? You've been biting them since you got teeth."

"But I've decided to stop, Dad. It's a horrid, habit, really it is, Dad."

"'Lovely' boy ... 'Horrid, habit? Did I send you to summer camp or finishing school? And why do you keep saying 'Dad, at the end of every sentence?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was doing it, Dad." he looked up, realizing he did it again. "Sorry, Dad." they both laughed. "Do you want to know why I keep saying Dad... ? The truth?"

"Because you missed your old man so much?"

"Exactly! it's because in my whole life, I mean for these past eight weeks, I was never able to ever say the word 'Dad'. Never. Not once! And a Dad is an irreplaceable person in a kids life. I mean think about it, there's a whole day, devoted to celebrating Fathers, right? Just imagine, someone's life without a Father. Never buying a Father's Day card, never getting their Father a birthday present, never sitting on their Father's lap, never being able to say, 'Hi, Dad', 'What's up, Dad?', 'Bye, Dad', 'catch you later, Dad'. A baby's first words are always Dada, aren't they? Then there's 'Daddy', 'Daddio', 'Pop', 'My old man'... Not to mention, 'Wait 'til your father gets home, and..."

"So, let me see if I get this ... you missed being able to call me Dad."

"Yeah. I really have, Dad." Kurt smiled as he turned under a wooden sign that said Martin Vineyard and Winery.

Cody looked out the window smiling. "Oh my God."

"Now you sound like your old self."

A rambling Victorian-style ranch house, with a wide porch that wrapped around the entire facade. Kurt tooted the horn as he drove down the long gravel driveway. Sammy, a big golden mutt, raced after the car, barking. Jose, Nick's right-hand man, arrived from the side of the house, drinking a small bottle of juice. He opened the Surburban's door for Cody.

"Well, look who finally decided to come home." Jose said.

"Hey, Jose." Cody said.

"Did your old man tell you we decided no more camp for you?"

Cody climbed out of the truck. "Yeah, he told me."

Jose gave Cody a hug. "It got too quiet around here, Zack. We couldn't stand it. Nobody blasting music, nobody playing hide and seek in the vineyards, nobody getting stuck up on the roof..."

Cody laughed as the screen door swung open and Chessy exited, humming as if she's a one-woman welcome home band. Chessy, the most lovable woman on the planet, early thirties, warm eyes, great sense of humor, lifted Cody right off his feet. "Hell-o, Gorgeous! You grew, you lost weight, you look fabulous, we missed you, don't let these bums talk you out of, going back to camp. You're a growing boy. You need adventure. You hungry? I made cornbread and chili. Why're you so quiet? What's wrong?"

"I'm just so happy to be home."

"Did I hear something about cornbread and chili?" Kurt passed them, holding Zack's duffel.

"It's on the stove..." she didn't even have to look to shout at Jose. "Wipe your feet, Jose!" Chessy looked Cody over, hugging him again. "You've changed, Zack ... I can't put my finger on it, but something about you has definitely changed..." Little did everyone know, Zack was really Cody and he was now, no longer a virgin thanks to his twin brother, apparently that will change a boy (or so they thought).

"Really? Me?" he watched as Sammy bounced down the steps. "Hi, Sammy!" Sammy sniffed at Cody's shoes, looking up at him, then backing off suspiciously, barking loudly at him.

Chessy looked down at the dog. "What's with you, goofball! It's Zack." Sammy continued barking.

"I probably smell like camp, that's all." Cody ran up the porch steps, followed by Chessy.

"What's wrong with you? It's like you didn't even recognize him." Chessy said to Sammy.

Cody looked around a spacious comfortable ranch house with high ceilings and panoramic views of Kurt's vineyards. "Wow! It's even better than the pictures."

"Whaddya want to do first, kiddo - unpack or eat? Or eat, then unpack? Or, we can eat while we unpack." Chessy said.

"You mean I can eat in my room?"

Chessy looked at him like he was nuts. "Yes, I would say that's a definite possibility."

As they headed up the stairs, Kurt entered eating a big bowl of chili. "Zack, when you're done, come on down, there's someone I want you to meet."

"Okay, Dad."

Kurt smiled. "Okay, Zack."

Cody continued then stopped, looking at Chessy. "Someone he wants me to meet?"

"-He didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" he heard the sound of a woman laughing and looked down. In the living room below, Kurt turned as a woman entered from the patio. She was a tawny beauty of twenty-six, wearing a chic sleeveless dress, sleek hair and heels. Kurt took her hand in his. Cody turned back to Chessy and mouthed "Who is that?" Chessy motioned for him to follow her upstairs.

Zacks room was sunny, warmly furnished with lots of magazines, CD's, and toys. The French doors were wide open to the balcony and a gentle breeze billowed the curtains.

"Who's the blonde?" Cody asked.

"Zack, it's none of my business how your father makes a fool out of himself, you understand? He's a big boy, he can do what he wants."

"Right. So who is she?"

"Her name's Meredith Blake. She's a publicist from San Francisco. Your father hired her at the beginning of the summer to do some publicity for the vineyard and if you ask me, she's done a better job selling herself than the grapes."

"Whaddya mean?"

"Look, you and I know your Dad's no suave debonair Bachelor of the Month-type, so I wonder what a young hot thing like her sees in a guy who walks around with his shirt-tail hanging out and his cereal bowl full of chili. Then I realized, there's a million reasons why that girl's giggling and they're all sitting in the Napa Valley Community Bank."

"You mean you don't think she even really likes Dad..."

"- What do I know? But I'll tell you one thing. This one could give Sharon Stone femme fatal lessons. She's got your father eating out of the palm of her hand. They ride together, they swim together, they're out to dinner every night. Not to mention she treats yours truly like the 'shlepper help' of all time which has really endeared her to me, as you can imagine; you go down and meet her and see for yourself. Don't let me influence you."

A few minutes later, Cody bounded down the stairs, wearing sunglasses and a faded Martin Vineyards T-shirt with swim trunks on. He looked around, seeing lots of photographs of Kurt and Zack when Zack was a baby. "We were such a cute baby." he smiled at a photo.

He was distracted when he heard Meredith's laugh. Cody lowered his sunglasses, peering over them at Meredith who was lounging by the pool ogling Kurt. Cody joined Kurt and Meredith under an umbrella. The vineyards and mountains cascading down from the pool creating an incredible vista.

"There's my boy! Zack, I want you to meet a friend of mine. Kiddo, this is Meredith Blake."

He waved. "Hi ..."

"Hi. Wow. I can't believe I'm finally meeting the famous Zack. I've looked forward to this all summer."

"Really? Well ... here I am."

"Kurty, he's adorable." Kurt cleared his throat. "The way your father talked about you I expected to meet a little boy but you're so grown up..."

"I'll be fourteen soon. How old are you?"

She was a little thrown by his question. "- Twenty-six."

"Only twelve years older than me. How old are you again, Dad?"

"Oh, suddenly he's interested in math. I'm gonna get some more chili and a bottle of champagne to celebrate." Kurt stood up.

"What are we celebrating?" Kurt paused.

"You're home-coming of course." Meredith jumped in.

Kurt and Meredith exchanged a quick look which was not lost on Cody. Kurt headed toward the house as Cody sat by the pool, dunking his feet in the water.

A cell-phone rang and Meredith flipped hers open. "Hello. Yes, Mr. Mosby... Uh-huh. I'll certainly ask him but I doubt if he'll be available. I understand it's for a local charity. Um-hmmm... I'm writing it all down." she wrote nothing down. "Okay, got it. Sounds very worthwhile, I-agree but unfortunately, I see that Mr. Martin will be out of the country those days. Yes, I'll be sure to mention it to him. Thank you." she snapped her phone shut and turned to Cody. "So. How was camp, Zack? Was it fabulous?"

"Yes, I loved it actually. My Dad's going out of the country? When?"

"No, no, I just had to say that to get him out of something." she quickly changed the subject. "You know I never heard a man talk about his son the way Kurty talks about you. You two are obviously incredibly close."

"We're closer than close. We're all each other has..." Cody did a huge cannonball into the pool, splashing water all over Meredith. Pissed, but controlling it, Meredith walked to the edge of the pool, picked up a towel and patted herself dry as Cody popped to the surface. "Sorry, did I get you wet, Mer?"

"Just a little, Zack." she said, trying to be sweet. "Hey, guess what? Your Dad took me riding the other day and he let me ride your horse. I hope that's okay with you."

"Oh, sure. Sprout's used to strange women riding her. Not that you're strange or anything. Actually, compared to the others, you seem relatively normal." he floated on his back.

Curiosity getting the best of her, she walked up to Cody. "Others? What others?"

"What others? Puh-leeze." he laughed hysterically, seeing Meredith's concern. "You want the 411?"

"The 411?"

"The 'information'... the lowdown on the other women. Can't say that I blame you. I'd want to know if I was number twentyeight ... I mean... number twenty-nine in a man's life."

"I'm number twenty-nine?"

"Well, yes but I didn't start counting 'til I was about four. God knows how many there were before then. It's always the same routine... horseback riding through the vineyards ... long romantic dinners with his special reserve label wine... moonlight swims ..." she nodded, intrigued. "But I always say, it's none of my business if a man his age wants to make a fool out of himself. Although, maybe he's changed and you're the real thing, Mer."

Just then, Kurt arrived with a bottle of Champagne. "Okay, here we go. A bottle of my special reserve label. You two find something to talk about while I was gone?"

Cody smiled and dove under the water, just like a little angel.

"Does that mean 'yes'?" he asked.

"It sure does." she tapped her fingers and watched the blonde boy swim around.


	7. Chapter 7

**I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters, I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

Grandfather walked right past the ringing phone, reading the morning paper while Carey stood at the top of the stairs, slipping on pair of heels.

"Somebody grab that, please." she asked politely.

Martin passed through carrying a tray with coffee on it. He picked up the phone, balancing the tray with his other hand. "Sprouse residence... Cody?"

Zack walked by. "Yes, Martin?"

He had to do a double take. "Oh dear, it sounded just like you on the phone." he turned back to the call. "I'm sorry, who did you wish to speak with? Cody? Of course. One moment, please." he handed Zack the phone. "A Miles Plotka for you... Sounds like your twin.

"My twin? Very funny." he took the phone and turned away. "Hello? Oh, Miles, how you doin'?"

Cody held the phone as he crossed the bedroom, sneaking into the bathroom and locking the door. "Hey! How's it going over there?." Cody asked

"Oh, everything's quite lovely here. We're expecting a bit of rain today but Miles, can you... hold on for a moment?" Zack saw that the coast was clear and ducked into the hall closet, shutting the door just as Martin walked past.

He did another double-take... "Where'd he go?"

Inside the closet, Zack pulled a string above his head, turning on the light. "Okay, now I can talk. Oh my God, Mom's incredible. I can not believe I've lived my entire life without knowing her. She's beautiful and fun and smart and I love the gowns she designs and her singing is beautiful and I got her talking about how she and Dad first met and what happened between them and if you ask me-"

Cody whistled into the phone. "Zack! Stop! We've got a major problem. You're going to have to bring mother out here immediately."

"Immediately? Are you nuts? I've had one day with her. I'm just getting to know her. I can't. I refuse."

"But this is an emergency. Dad's in love."

Zack laughed. "Get out of here. Dad doesn't fall in love. I mean, not seriously."

"Trust me, he's serious, about this one. He's always holding her hand, kissing her neck, waiting on her hand and foot..."

Zack sunk to the floor. "He is...?"

"It's disgusting."

"Well, you'll just have to break 'em up. Sabotage her. Do whatever you have to. The only one's around here that are suppose to be in love are you and me, and Mom and Dad."

"I'm trying but I'm at a slight disadvantage I only met the man twelve hours ago. You've got to get back here to help me." Cody couldn't help but smile at his brother's words.

"Cody, I can't. I want more time with Mom." Zack found a piece of paper in one of Cody's coat pockets and wrinkled it over the receiver making it sound like static. "Cody, are you still there? I can barely hear you... Cod..." he hung up the phone.

"I'm here! What are you..?"

"Operator... ! Operator... Sorry, think I lost you, Cody." he smiled.

Cody, knowing what was up, held the phone away from his ear. "Thanks for your help, Zack."

Zack cracked open the closet door and crawled out on all fours, only to find his Mother, Grandfather and Martin standing in the foyer, all looking down at him. "Had a phone call. From a friend at camp. It's an old camp tradition... Talk to your best friend from inside a closet... kinda stupid, I know but..." he stood up and placed the phone on the table, sighing.

"So... Breakfast anyone?" Chessy carried two plates across the kitchen to Cody. They were loaded with bacon, eggs, pancakes and toast. "Okay, here we go, most important meal of the day... Eggs sunny side up, bacon, toast and just in case you're really hungry... a stack of humongous chocolate chip pancakes which smell incredible, if I do say so myself." she placed it all in front of Cody.

"Thanks, Chessy." Cody said, not too interested.

Chessy waved her hand over the food, sending it's aroma toward Cody. "Not hungry again? You hardly ate your chili, your favorite food and now you're not eating your breakfast. You're not sick, are you?" Chessy put her hand on Cody's forehead, then joined him at the kitchen table.

"I'm fine, I promise. Where's Dad?"

"He and Miss-" she imitated Meredith, "'I'll just have half a grapefruit, thank you', left about an hour ago. You overslept and he didn't want to wake you. Of course, I'd oversleep too if I was up at midnight making mysterious phone calls from my bathroom."

"Oh, that. I was calling a friend from camp. Miles. He lives in New York."

"Oh, I see and you wanted to call Miles at a time that was convenient for him. Because of the time difference."

"Exactly. Because of the time difference."

"Uh-huh. So you waited until it was three in the morning his time. That makes perfect sense."

"Actually, it was seven at night his time. You see he lives in New York but he was on vacation with his family in Bora Bora." Cody took a bite of bacon and gave Chessy a smile.

Chessy gave him a stare. "Very smooth. Your Dad wants you to go over to his office as soon as you're done with breakfast."

"He does? Thanks." Cody shoved a piece of bacon in his mouth. "I'm done." he rose as Sammy entered, seeing Cody and growled as he scooted around him. "That dog has gotten so weird! Bye, Chessy, thanks again for breakfast. It was great."

Chessy looked down at the plate of untouched food. Cody pushed on the screen door but it went nowhere. Chessy watched him carefully. "Pull, Zack." Cody laughed, pulled on the door and ran out. Chessy picked up the plate on the table picking at the food Cody didn't touch, wondering what was going on.

A little later, Kurt and Cody walked through a huge vaulted room that housed hundreds of wooden barrels filled with wine. Kurt put his arm around Cody, "Kiddo, I'm glad you're here, there's something really important I want to talk to you about."

"That's funny because there's something really important I want to talk to you about."

"Okay, you go first."

"No, you."

"Okay, I want to talk to you about Meredith."

"And I want to talk to you about my mother." he paused. "What about Meredith?"

Kurt was thrown. "W-W-What about your mother?"

"Dad, I'm almost fourteen, how long do you expect me to buy that story that The Stork dropped me on your doorstep?"

"C'mon, Zack, we've talked about your mother..."

"No we haven't. Not really. A boy needs more in life than half of a crumpled old photograph. Dad, I'm a teenager, face it, I need a mother."

"You know what? You're right. You do. Which brings me to-" They turned a corner and bumped into Meredith who was walking with her British assistant, Richard. "Meredith!"

"Hi." she noticed Cody. "Hello, Zack."

"Hi there."

"Zack, this is my assistant, Richard. Richard, this is Nick's son, the one I've been telling you so much about."

Richard spoke with a stuffy British accent. "Oh, hello. How are you, luv?"

"Oh, don't tell me you're British? How lovely." Cody spoke in his own British accent.

Kurt was surprised. "How'd you do that?"

"You do an absolutely marvelous British accent." Richard said.

"Yours isn't bad either, old chap-." Richard laughed.

Meredith turned to Kurt and whispered. "Did you tell him?"

"Almost."

"Hey, if you're free later, why don't we all have lunch on the terrace?" Meredith suggested.

"Actually, I promised Zack we'd hang out together this afternoon." Kurt said as Cody smiled.

"No problem. I've got plenty to do... I'm working on a new label design, Kurty... featuring Y-0-U. You're gonna love it." she blew a kiss. "See you for dinner, darling. Bye, Zack." As Meredith and Richard walked away, she turned to him. "First change I make in that household is to send that two-faced little brat off to boarding school in Timbuktu."

Richard gave an exaggerated shiver. "Oooooooo. Ice woman."

"And proud of it, babe."

Kurt and Cody galloped on horseback over the crest of the mountain. As they slowed their horses to a walk, Kurt spoke to Cody. "So, you excited about our camping trip?"

"What camping trip?"

"What camping trip? The one we go on every summer before you go back to school."

"Oh, that camping trip. Yeah, sure... I can't wait."

"So, Zack, what do you think of Meredith?"

"As what, Dad? Your publicist? Your friend? Your ... ?"

"- Just what do you think of her... as a person?"

"Well, she's cute, she has nice hair, good teeth, she can spell the word YOU... I don't know. Honestly, Dad, the woman's a complete stranger to me. Why do you want my opinion anyway?"

"Well, I'll tell you why... because believe it or not, honey..."

"- Race you back to the ranch, Dad!" Cody jammed his heels into Sprout's flanks and the horse took off like a bat out of hell.

"Zack, I'm trying to tell you something!"

Out of breath, Cody ran up the porch steps and threw open the screen door. Cody stopped in the living room, catches his breath. He was a little panicky. "I'm in so over my head here. I can't handle this alone. I just can't. I'm only one kid." he said to himself.

Chessy peeked her head around the side of the arm chair she had been sitting in. "You got something you'd like to share with the class?"

Cody jumped, frightened. "Oh, Chessy, you gave me a fright!"

"I gave you a fright?"

"You scared me. I didn't know you were like, in here."

Chessy stood up, "You sure there's nothing you want to talk to me about? Like maybe why Sammy never comes near you anymore or why your appetite's suddenly changed or why all of a sudden you're neat as a pin and using expressions like, 'You gave me a fright'?"

"Chessy, I changed a lot over the summer, that's all."

"If I didn't know better, I'd say it's almost as if you were..." she shook her head. "Oh, never mind, that's too impossible." she turned to leave.

"- Almost as if I were...? Chessy?"

"Nobody. Nobody. Forget I even mentioned it."

"Almost as if I were... Cody?" Chessy stopped, stunned, goose-bumps popped up all over.

"You know about Cody?"

"I AM Cody."

Just then, Kurt entered, also a little out of breath. "- Why'd you take off like that? I told you I wanted-to talk to you about something? Chessy, why are you looking at him like that?"

"Like what? I'm not looking at him any special way." her eyes began tearing up. "I'm looking at him just like I've looked at her for thirteen years. Since the day he came home from the hospital, six pounds, eleven ounces, twenty-one inches long." she was crying now. "This is how I look at him. Can I hug him?" Chessy, all broken up, hugged Cody like she's hugging him for the first time. "He's so beautiful and so big." Cody gave Chessy a look that said, 'Please don't say anything!' "I'm gonna go make you something special to eat. What would you like? Oh, it doesn't matter. I'll whip up everything we've got." she took off as Kurt approached Cody.

"Why's everybody acting so nutty around here? Zack, we gotta talk."

"Okay. Shoot."

"Honey, look... I want to know what you think about making Meredith part of the family?"

"Part of our family?"

"Yes."

"I think it's an awesome idea. Inspired. Brilliant really."

"You do?"

"Totally. it's like a dream come true. I've always wanted a big sister."

"Honey, I'm afraid you're kind of missing the point."

"No, I'm not. You're going to adopt Meredith. That is so sweet, Dad.."

"I'm not going to adopt her, I'm going to MARRY her."

"Marry her? That's insane! How can you marry a woman young enough to be my big sister?" he stared ranting and raving, then slipped into French. "Je n'arrive pas à le croire! Je n'arrive pas à te croire! Vous etes stupide!"

"Zack, calm down." he realized what his son had just said. "Now you speak French?"

"I learned it at camp." he took a breath. "Okay, I'm sorry. Let's discuss this calmly and rationally..."

"And in English, if you don't mind. Man, what has gotten into you?"

"Nothing. It's nothing... Just... Just..." he inhaled deeply, and let it all out. "Dad, you can't get married! It'll totally ruin completely everything!" Cody stormed out.

Kurt noticed Chessy standing in the doorway, biting her nails nervously. "Don't look at me, I know nothing."

A horn honked outside and Kurt looked out the window and saw Meredith getting out of her red Mercedes convertible. Kurt sunk into a chair, as he heard Zack's door slam upstairs. "Maybe I am too old for this." Kurt said.

Meredith swept into the room, wearing sunglasses. "Hi, doll." She sat on Kurt's lap, wrapping her arms around him. She kissed him, and kissed him again. She ran her fingers through his hair. "You look stressed, baby. How about a Martini?"

"How about a double?"

Meredith snapped open her purse and took out a Tiffany box. She removed a small sliver bell which she held up and rang. "Chessy?" she called and rang it again as Kurt gave her a curious look. "Don't you love it? it's just what we need. It's such a big house." she rang again.

Chessy appeared, not too wild about the bell. "You rang?"

"Two martinis, please. And make Mr. Martin's a double." Chessy just stood there.

"Please, Chess. I'm getting a migraine..." Kurt smiled a bit.

Chessy held her shirt-tails out as if they were a skirt and curtsied.

"I don't know if a uniform will make her look better or worse." Meredith said.

Kurt rubbed his temples. "I told Zack."

"You did? And?"

"He went ballistic. Started yelling in French, which I didn't even know he spoke, I just don't get him lately..."

"Kurty, this reaction is totally classic. It's 'Daddy's Getting Remarried - 101'. I'd worry if he didn't react this way. Look, why don't I talk to him..."

"He's a little sensitive about you right now."

Meredith kissed him. "That's why I need to do it. We've got to break the ice sometime." she unbuttoned Kurt's shirts top button. "Wear your shirt like this... I like when I can see a little chest hair."

Cody sat on Zack's deck, feet propped-up on the banister, shuffling a deck of cards. Meredith appeared behind him, knocking on the open door. "Knock-knock." Cody turned around. "Can I join you?"

He shrugged. "Sure."

"Guess the news of the engagement came as a bit of a shock, huh?"

"Basically."

"You know, I remember what it was like to be thirteen. I had my first beau at thirteen. It's a wonderful age. You're starting to feel like an adult and believe it or not, soon you'll understand what it's like to be in love."

"Love? I don't think you know the half of it.."

"Well, take it from someone who fell in love very early in life... being in love is a fantastic mystery that takes a man and woman on a magical journey to a place..."

"- I don't mean to be jerky when you're trying to be all mushy and everything but I think I know what mystery my Dad sees in you."

"You do?"

"You're young and beautiful and sexy and hey, the guy's only human. But if you ask me, marriage is supposed to be based on something more than just sex, right? I mean, I'm not even married and yet I know that sex isn't the only thing in my relationships."

"You've had sex? Boy, your father underestimates you."

"Of course I have. But you won't underestimate me, will you, Meredith?" they studied each other carefully.

"So what if I'm young and beautiful? That's not a crime, you know. And for your information, I adore your father. He's exactly the kind of man I always planned on marrying. This is the real deal, honey and nothing you do is going to come between us. The reality is, angel, you are no longer the only one in Kurt Martin's life. Get over it."

"If this is the real deal, then my Dad's money has nothing do with you wanting to marry him, right?"

"I hope you're not suggesting I'm marrying your father for his money."

"All I know is, I've seen Cinderella a few zillion times and I'd rather not end up scrubbing the floors and befriending all the birds in the neighborhood while you're having breakfast in bed... if you get my drift?"

"You are unbelievably out of line, young man." she rose up from her seat. "Now you listen and listen good. I'm marrying your father in two weeks whether you like it or not. So I suggest you do not tangle with me anymore. You're in way over your head. Is that clear?"

"Crystal."

**Heh' ... so ... .' **


	8. Chapter 8

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters. I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

The fax machine rang as a fax slithered out. A hand reached for the fax. Martin, stood in Carey's kitchen in London. He looked at the fax quizzically, then carried it into the dining room where Zack was eating dinner with his Mother and Grandfather. Martin refilled the adults' wine glasses, holding the fax behind his back as he poured.

"This is fantastic wine by the way Martin." Carey said.

"May I have a-sip?" Zack asked.

Carey offered him a sip. "I don't think you're going like it."

Zack swirled the wine confidently, passed it under his nose, then took a healthy sip. "If you ask me, the bouquet is a little too robust for a Merlot. But then again, I'm partial to the softer California grape."

Carey and his Grandfather laughed, as Martin moved next to Zack, holding the fax behind his back. Zack cocked his head to read it. The fax was a drawing of Sammy, Zack's dog, laying on the front porch of Zack's house. A cartoon bubble coming out of his mouth saying 911! Zack bent over so far to read the fax he fell off his chair right onto the floor.

"Honey, are you okay?" Carey peeked under the table.

"Had one sip too many, I guess." he stood up. "You know, Mother, I feel like I could use a bit of fresh air. Would it be okay if I stepped outside for a moment?"

"Of course. Are you okay? Would you like me to come with you?"

"No, no. I'll be fine... Just got a touch woozy, that's all." Zack wiped his mouth with his napkin and excused himself. His grandfather watched him closely as he exited the room.

Zack hurried down the picturesque street, turned a corner, spotted a phone and rushed to it. He pulled the door closed and dialed the Operator. "Yes, I'd like to make a collect-call to California, please. Area code 707 ... 78."

Cody paced, biting his nails for real now. The phone rang. He pounced on it in mid-ring. "Hello? Yes, I'll accept the charges. Zack, thank goodness you got my fax. I'm absolutely desperate."

"What's up? Why the 911?"

"Dad's getting married."

Zack laughed. "Whaddya mean, getting married?"

"I mean black tie, white gown, the whole enchilada. The wedding's in two weeks so, if there's any hope of getting Mom and Dad back together, we've got to do it fast." outside the phone booth, a man read the evening paper, waiting to use the-phone.

"Okay, Mom and I are going to the theater tonight so I'll drop the bomb on her first thing in the morning."

"Give Mom a kiss for me, willya. And Grandfather, too. And Zack, hurry."

Zack hung up and stepped out of the booth, bumping into the Man who had been waiting.

"Oh, excuse me." he said. The man turned around, reveling that it was Zack's grandfather. "Uh-oh..."

"What do you say you and I take a little stroll in the park, young man."

Zack bit his locket as his Grandfather led him into the park.

The next morning, Carey sat up in bed, in white satin pajamas, finishing a cup of coffee and a phone call to Paris. She was sketching a wedding gown on a pad as she talked. "Au, Mademoiselle. I will have the sketch to you by tomorrow. I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you. Au revoir."

Zack appeared in the doorway, listening to his mother talk on the phone. Grandfather walked by and gave him a little nudge, pushing him into the room.

"Hi, sweetie. Come on in." she patted the bed. Zack crossed the room and climbed in next to his mother. She wrapped her arm around him. "I have to finish this sketch and Fed Ex it to Paris, then how about you and I go out to lunch and spend the rest of the day getting lost in stores?"

Zack nervously spoke. "I can't. Mom, sorry, I have to go out of town today."

"You have to go out of town?" she smiled, thinking her son was kidding. "And where may I ask are you going? Zack squirmed under the covers, entirely disappearing. "Cody?"

From under the covers he spoke. "That's where I have to go. I have to go see Cody."

She decided to play along. "I see. And where would Cody be?"

Zack's shape squirmed further under the covers. "In Napa with his father, Kurt Martin."

Suddenly, it hit her, her eyes widened and she looked up to see her father leaning in the door frame, puffing on his pipe. He nodded. Carey's eyes instantly filled with tears. She lifted the covers to see Zack, hiding, scared to death. "You're not Cody?"

"That would be correct."

"You're Zack..."

"I am." he crawled out from under covers, then with his American accent, "Cody and I met at camp and we decided to switch places. I'm sorry, but I'd never seen you and I'd dreamt of meeting you my whole life and Cody felt the exact same way about Dad, so we just sorta switched lives. I hope you're not mad because I love you so much and I just hope one day you can love me as me and not as Cody."

"Oh, honey, I've loved you your whole life." she took Zack in her arms. "Why didn't you tell me it was you all along? Zack?"

Zack spoke through teary eyes, "I was scared."

Martin stood in the doorway with Zack's grandfather, bawling hysterically. His grandfather stepped into the room, closing the door. Martin fell into Grandfather's arms, heaving. "I've never been so happy in my entire life."

Carey and Zack wiped their tears away after breaking their long hug.

"I guess you have to switch us back now, huh?"

"Legally, you belong to your father and Cody belongs to me."

"'His' and 'Hers, kids. No offense, Mom, but this arrangement really sucks."

"I agree, it totally sucks. I don't want to lose you now that we've been together."

"Well, then I guess we'll just have to fly to Napa, see Cody and Dad and work this whole thing out."

"I guess we will."

"Will you be nervous about seeing Dad again?"

"No, of course not." as if it's preposterous, Carey continued. I can handle seeing Kurt Martin after all these years. People see their ex's all the time, don't they? Not to worry, sweetheart. I'll take care of everything. Not-to-worry."

The following day, Carey was a mess. She wore a silk blouse over a slip and a few Velcro rollers just on top of her head. She paced around open luggage that was laid out on the bed behind her. Martin entered carrying freshly pressed clothes for her luggage. "I'm sorry, I can't handle this. I haven't seen or heard from Kurt Martin in over thirteen years and suddenly I'm flying halfway across the world to... I'm not mature enough for this. If the man didn't make me so nuts, I'd still be married to him." she pulled out her rollers. "We came up with this arrangement so we'd never have to see each other again." she put on her sunglasses. "Look at me, Martin, have you ever seen me like this? Don't answer that. What if he doesn't recognize me? Be honest, Martin, how old do I look? No, don't answer that either. Hey, what am I worried about? He could be fat or bald. Or both."

"Actually, Zack says his Dad's quite the hunk. And never re-married, either. Just like you, ma'am."

"Martin, it just so happens I'm not remarried by choice. I've had my opportunities for llamour. Not lately, of course. But I've had my share of gentlemen callers."

"Not lately."

"I just said that! Zack said he was a hunk, huh? He was rather dashing. He used to make me weak in the knees, if you Can imagine that." she looked in the mirror. "Is that a grey hair?" She yanked the hair out as Zack entered carrying an overnight bag.

"All set, Mom."

Carey was suddenly composed. "Good. Me too. Almost. Not quite."

"Mom, your suitcase is totally empty."

"Oh. Right. Sorry. Did you speak to your father, dear?"

Martin looked at Zack and they locked eyes for an instant, then turned to his Mom. "Uh, yeah, I just hung up with him, actually. He said he's really anxious to see you."

"He did? Anxious-nervous, like he's dreading it or anxious-excited like he's looking forward to it?"

"Anxious-excited, definitely." Again, Martin squinted at Zack, just knowing he was lying. But Zack rolled on... "He said he'll meet us tomorrow at noon at the Four Seasons in San Francisco."

"Tomorrow? My, my that's incredibly soon, isn't it? Well, honey, why don't you run downstairs and gather our tickets from your Grandfather while I finish up here?"

Zack started out as Martin followed. "Liar, Liar, pants on fire..." Martin said to Zack.

"Oh, Martin, could you come back for a moment, please?"

Zack raised his finger to his lips to 'Ssshhh' Martin, as he re-entered Carey's room.

"Martin, I have a really ridiculous, somewhat childish request to make. Martin, you know you're more than a Butler to me. You're like a lovable brother who just happens to wait on us and..." Martin nodded momentarily. "Anyway, I was wondering if..."

"- I'd accompany you to make the trip a bit easier for you?"

"Would you, Martin? I'd be forever grateful. And you don't even have to go as our butler. Just as a friend."

"Madame, I'd be honored. And as a friend, may I say..." he reached into her closet. "- if I were seeing my ex after thirteen years and I had your legs..." he pulled out a little red dress. "I'd wear this baby. You'll kill in it."

That afternoon a Limousine waited at the curb. Martin, in a black leather jacket and shades, handed the luggage off to the Limo Driver. Carey hugged her Father good-bye. Then, Zack threw his arms around his grandfather.

"Bye, Pop."

"Bye, Zack."

"You're coming to Napa for Thanksgiving, right?"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Zack rose up on his tiptoes and kisses his Grandfathers cheek good-bye.

As Zack ran off, his grandfather shouted to him. "Say hello to your Father for me!"

Zack waved as he got into the limo. "I will!"

Above The Four Seasons Hotel's entrance, a clock clicked to twelve noon. Meredith walked across the lobby with her parents, a stunning couple in their early fifties. They were very young, naturally and anyone could see where she got her looks and confidence from.

Meredith checked her watch. "Okay, they'll be here any minute... Be nice, Daddy. He's everything you ever wanted for your little girl... plus millions more."

"Then you know I'll be nice." her father said.

Meredith laughed. "Okay, there he is..." her face dropped. "- with the whole motley crew."

From the front entrance, Kurt, Cody, Chessy and Sammy entered the Lobby. Meredith rushed to greet them, kissing Kurt.

"Hi, darling..." she nodded to the others. "Zack, Chessy... And Sammy, what in the world are you doing here?" she turned to Kurt. "Honey, a dog in The Four Seasons?"

"Zack begged me to bring him."

"And naturally you said 'yes'." Sammy snapped at Meredith.

"Good doggy." Chessy said to Sammy. "Meredith, these the folks..?"

"Yes! Mom... Dad... finally, you all meet." she linked arms with Kurt. "This is my fiance and the love of my life, Kurt Martin and this is his adorable Son Zack who we can all thank for bringing us together this weekend... This entire get together was his idea I'll have you know..."

"Well, how are you young man, I've heard nothing but wonderful things about you." Meredith's father said. Kurt beamed.

A taxi pulled up and Martin and Zack stepped out. Martin then reached in the backseat and helped Carey out. She was wearing dark sunglasses and was more than a little tipsy. She took a small airplane-size vodka bottle from her purse and polished it off, tossing it over her shoulder. Martin caught it before it crashed to the ground. As Zack and Martin guided Carey up the steps to the hotel...

"That was a great flight, wasn't it? So quick."

"I never saw you so... thirsty, before, ma'am." Martin said.

"- You mean you never saw me drink so much vodka before! Guess what? I've got news for you, Marty old chap... never tasted the stuff before. Not once."

"Could've fooled me, ma'am."

She turned to the doorman. "Hello, Doorman. Oh, you scared me, I thought you were real for a minute.."

"I'm in such major trouble here." Zack said to himself.

In the main lobby, Martin and Zack led Carey through the Lobby and deposited her at the Front Desk. Miraculously, Kurt and Meredith were nowhere in sight. Carey rang the bell a zillion times and Zack stopped her by placing his hand over the bell.

"Mom, you gonna be okay?"

"Absolutely. Never felt better in my life. But darling, tell me 'cause I'm a bit confused... Have we landed yet?" With that comment, Zack laid his head down on the counter.

On the other side of the Lobby is where Meredith, her folks, Kurt, Chessy, Cody and Sammy exited a dining room.

"- I'm just saying, I know it's short notice, but if they can do it, I think it would be a brilliant room for the wedding... Not too big, not too cramped... Not that I don't like the idea of getting married at the house... I do but this could be... amazing..." Meredith was rambling on.

Back on the other side of the lobby, Zack led Carey away from the front desk and toward a bank of elevators. Carey tried to hitch a ride on a passing luggage cart and Martin had to peel her off. Again, back on the other side of the lobby, Sammy sniffed like a Hound Dog on the hunt, pulling Cody away from Kurt, Meredith and Meredith's Folks. Cody held onto Sammy's leash while at the same time, holding Chessy's hand. They were dragged across the lobby as the others stayed behind.

"I've already checked us in, so why don't we go up to the rooms, freshen up, then meet for lunch?"

"Sounds good, I'm starved. Meet you back here in ten." her father said.

Meredith kissed her father on the cheek. "Perfect." she then leaned on Kurt. "Sweetheart, want to check out the Honeymoon Suite while we're here? I bet it's to die for."

Carey, Zack and Martin stepped into an open elevator. As the doors were about to close ...

"Oh, jeez..." Carey stuck out her hand and the doors popped back open. "- Forgot my purse." she rushed out of the elevator and crossed back toward the front desk just as... Sammy sniffed his way toward Zack's open elevator. Sammy looked up, seeing his favorite boy!

"Sammy!" Zack and Cody locked eyes as Sammy bolted from Cody and leaped into the elevator, paws up on Zack, licking his face. At the front desk, Carey grabbed her purse and headed back to the elevator where she joined Cody, putting her arm around him. Chessy's eyes widened and she did an immediate about-face so as not to be seen.

"Honey, you didn't have to wait for me, I could've found the room by myself. Besides ..." she lowered her voice to a whisper. "I've got to make a pit stop. Vodka makes you have to go like crazy... Go on, weeties, I'll meet you supstairs ..." Chessy took a peek at her. "I mean, upthstair... uppth... upppthst... I'll meet thyou up... thstairs!" she looked at Cody's jacket. "I like that jacket by the way. Were you wearing that the whole time on the plane?" Carey turned back and just missed colliding with a Bellhop carrying a huge bouquet of flowers. Cody slapped his forehead.

"She's drunk. She's never had more than one glass of wine in her entire life and she chooses today to show up zonked." he said to Chessy.

Chessy led Cody into an elevator. "Just do what the woman says and meet her upthstairs." Chessy and Cody got into a waiting elevator, it's doors closed and they are gone. A beat later, Kurt and Meredith strolled up to the same elevators. Meredith nibbled on Kurt's ear as an elevator arrived. They stepped inside the elevator.

"Alone at last." Meredith folded her arms around Kurt's neck. At that very moment, Kurt spotted Carey- standing directly in font of him. Kurt blinked, unable to believe his eyes. Carey smiled and gave him a little wave.

Kurt's eyes widened as Meredith, her back to Carey, continued kissing Kurt. As the elevator doors started to close, Kurt leaned further and further to his right, trying to keep his eyes on Carey. He leaned, he leaned... but the doors closed. He stood there stunned, eyes wide open.

**Sorry, there isn't much twincest in this...but since we're in a hotel now and they're back together...I'll find some way for them to get naughty eventually... ;) Sorry about the name issue, I'm tired..I've been working about 42 hours a week and I'm actually reading a script and I'm getting terribly confused...so, I apologize.  
**


	9. Chapter 9

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters. I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

**Okay...I suppose we're ALMOST done...  
**

Moments later Carey barreled down the hallway, focused and furious. "Zachary Martin!" Simultaneously, two doors opened directly across from one another. Zack stood in one, Cody in the other. "Don't do this to me, I'm already seeing double! Which one of you is Zack?" Zack raised his hand. "Okay, now..." she softened at the sight of Cody. "Oh, honey ... hi..."

"Hi, Mom." Cody said.

Carey crossed to Cody and hugged him. "You look beautiful. So tan and healthy..." she kissed him on the forehead.

"Okay you two.. How could you do this to me?"

Chessy walked up behind Cody. "May I suggest we take this little pow-wow inside." she turned to Carey. "Hi, you probably don't remember me..."

"Chessy!" Carey said warmly.

"I knew I always liked you." she smiled.

In the hotel suite, Zack and Cody sat on the bed side by side. "Let me put this as simple as possible. You..." she pointed to Zack. "I mean," then pointed to Cody and sighed, giving up. "- One of you told me your father knew I was arriving here today... And I'm here to tell you the man I just saw in the elevator had absolutely no idea he and I were on the same planet, let alone in the same hotel."

"You saw Dad already?" Cody asked.

"Yes. And it was completely and utterly humiliating. I gotta lie down..." She flopped down on sofa, resting her head on a pillow. "The man went completely ashen. Like I was the bloody ghost of Christmas past." she rubbed her head. "Can one of you get me something cold for my head?" the boys crossed to the bar. "Don't you think I've pondered what it was going to be like to see your father again after all these years?" the boys exchanged looks. "Well, let me tell you, me waving like a mindless idiot while Kurt Martin is wrapped in another woman's arms is not exactly the scenario I had in mind. No sireee..." Cody walked over with a glass of water, while Zack carried a damp cloth. "Thank you." she placed the cloth on her head and began speaking again. "And furthermore and much worse, is the fact that I've been lied to by my own children and I'd like to know why." Martin passed through the room wearing only a speedo bathing suit. "Martin! What are you doing?"

"Going for a swim. Do you mind?"

"No, no, that's perfectly perfect. By all means, yes, have fun... someone ought to. Just put on a shirt... my God..." She lied down again as Chessy entered from an adjoining room with Sammy.

She stopped when she saw Martin. "Oh... Hell-o."

"Hello, Hello..." they looked at each other as if there seemed to be something in the air between them.

"Oh, Chessy, this is our butler, Martin." Carey said.

Plainly interested, Chessy extended her hand. "How do you do?" she indicated to Zack. "I'm his butler."

Martin gently placed a kiss on her hand. "Enchante, mademoiselle."

"Gee, the pleasure's all mine, monsieur." The boys couldn't believe the way they were acting, and tried to suppress their giggles.

"Boys! You were going to tell me why you lied and brought me here without telling your father!"

"Were they? O-kay, that's good." Chessy started tip-toeing out. "Well, then why don't I just slip back into my room and check out the ol' mini bar..."

Martin tried to escape as well. "Allow me to assist you..."

Carey sat up. "Wait! You mean everyone knows but me? What's going on here?" Everyone froze.

"Mom... Daddy's getting married." Cody said.

"Oh. I see... getting married..."

"- To Cruella de Ville. She's awful, Mom...We can't let him go through with it." Cody unconsciously traced his fingers on Zack's hand.

"Boys, your father's a grown man and quite capable of deciding whom he wishes to marry.."

"But she's all wrong for him. And the only way he won't marry her is..." Zack turned to Cody. "You tell her, she knows you better."

"Is if he sees you again."

Carey placed the pieces together. "You're trying to fix me up with your father."

"Why not? You're perfect for each other." Zack said.

"A match made in heaven." Cody smiled and gripped Zack's hand tightly.

By now, Chessy and Martin had reached the door. "Hold it! You two knew about this?" Carey said to them.

They turned and mumbled, slurring words over top of each other. "No. Not exactly. We tried to reasoning with them. What could we do? They made us do it. We're the hired help. Don't fire us. It was a mistake."

Carey stood up, unsteady. "Okay, let me say this loud and clear. Kurt Martin and I have nothing in common... anymore. Plus, in case you haven't noticed, he seems extremely content with his leggy, long haired, tight-skirted fiance. I want the two of you to explain to your father that I am here for one purpose only and that's to switch you two back. Now, let's do what we have to do and be done with it. Understood?"

In the suite next door. Meredith sat with Kurt. "No. I don't understand."

Kurt nervously ran his fingers through his hair and straightened his clothes as he tried to get out the door. "I just need to go downstairs for a few minutes to c-c-clear my head... then I'll meet you for lunch."

"Clear your head? What do you have to clear your head about? Is something wrong?"

"I hope not. I mean... no. What could be wrong? We're getting married in ten days, everything's perfect. I gotta go." He quickly kissed her on the cheek, opened the door.

"We're still going ring shopping after lunch, right?"

"Ring shopping?"

"Kurty!"

"Of course! For the funeral. I mean, for the wedding."

"The funeral?"

"I'm kidding." he laughed. "Don't listen to me. I'll see you there. I mean, here. Downstairs." He slipped out the door, hurried down the corridor and bumped right into Cody.

Cody, pretending he was Zack smiled. "Hey, Dad, what's up?"

"Just running down to the lobby. Hey, Zack, do me a favor, keep Meredith company, willya? " he rushed off. "Thanks, kiddo." he turned back. "Do I look alright? Like presentable and everything? Not too old?"

"You look fab, Dad. Young and fabulous."

Kurt rushed off the elevator and looked around for Carey. He turned a corner and bumped into the real Zack, who hadn't seen his Dad all summer.

"Dad!"

"I thought you were going to keep Meredith company?"

"I was? I mean, I am. Yeah. I was actually just looking for her." he smiled and rocked on his heels. "It's great to see you, Dad." He couldn't help himself and gave his Dad a quick hug.

"It's great to see you too, squirt." he patted him on the head. "Now go on, get up there." Kurt headed off in one direction as Zack ran to the elevators.

An elevator pinged and Meredith stepped out, checking herself in a compact. She snapped the lid shut when she saw Zack, who had never laid eyes on her before. "Have you seen your father?"

"You talkin' to me?"

"What are you, Robert DeNiro? Yes, I'm talking to you."

He realized who she was. "Oh! Meredith... Uh, yeah, I just saw him..."

"Well, hel-lo? Where was he?"

"Oh, he went; thataway, I think." he sized her up as he pointed.

"What are you staring at?"

"Oh, nothing. You really are pretty... -that's all."

"Don't tell me you're going to break your rotten streak and suddenly be nice to me?" she started off. "If you see your father, tell him I'm waiting."

"Whatever you say,'Cruella." he said to himself.

Kurt ducked his head into the hotel gift shop, looking for Carey. Instead, he saw Cody buying a candy bar. He did a double-take. "What are you doing? I thought you were gonna..."

"- She wasn't in her room, Dad."

"She wasn't? Oh... okay... See you in a little bit, kid."

"If not sooner, Dad."

Moments later, Kurt walked along the corridor, looked through a bank of windows and thought he saw Carey walking through the hotels garden. He tried to get a closer look but got caught in the midst of a group of Japanese Tourists. Carey noticed him and gave a little wave. Kurt weaved through the Tourists but when he got to the patio, Carey was gone. Discouraged, he paused, then saw Zack sitting in a large wicker chair, under a palm tree, sipping a fruit cocktail he jumped, surprised.

"Lookin, for somebody, Dad?"

Later, at the hotel bar Meredith entered, taking a seat at the nearly empty bar. The only one other customer seated at the bar was Carey. Meredith sat one stool away from her. The Bartender delivered a red concoction to Carey, who held a glass of ice to her head.

"Here you go. This'll cure anything you got. Just don't ask what's in it."

Carey hesitated. "Okay... Here's to.." she turned to Meredith, not recognizing her. "Here's to you. May your life be far less complicated than mine."

"Thank you..." Carey tossed down the drink and winced at the taste. "Martini, dry and a pack of Parliaments." Meredith ordered.

Carey belched and patted her chest. "Excuse me..." she turned to Meredith. "I apologize. Really, I'm so sorry think I just drank tar."

The Bartender handed Meredith her drink and Carey her bill. Carey signed her check and Meredith snuck a peak at her signature, practically choking on her Martini. "You're Carey Sprouse?"

"Guilty."

"I can't believe it. You're the designer and singer, Carey Sprouse?"

"Still guilty."

"I faxed your office just yesterday. I saw a wedding dress you designed and fell completely in love with it. Your office said you were out of town and they didn't know if you could make another one. I can't believe it. This is fate." she moved to the seat next to her, extending her hand. "I'm Meredith Blake."

Carey shook her hand. "How do you do?"

Kurt stepped into the sunlight, still searching for Carey. He saw a woman resembling Carey sitting under a large straw hat. He crossed to her, took a quick peek, realized it was not her and smiled an apology to the Lady and her BodyBuilder Husband. He backed into an umbrella as Meredith's parents joined him.

"There you are! We've been looking all over for you!" Mr. Blake said.

"I think this hotel is perfect for the wedding... The more I see of it, the more I like it." Mrs. Blake smiled.

Kurt was still looking around. "Me too. Absolutely." Kurt glanced across the pool and spotted Carey arrive, talking on a cell phone. She waved shyly at Kurt, slipping on her sunglasses.

"Tell me, dear, how many guests will there be from your side of the family? Just a guesstimate?" Mrs. Blake asked.

Kurt kept staring at Carey. "I'm not sure at the moment... Can I get back to you on that one?"

"Of course, And are we thinking formal attire or..." A small contingent passed in front of Carey, blocking her from Kurt's view.

Not wanting to lose her, he darted around a towel boy, side-stepped around a couple of toddlers, then tripped over a rubber duck. Chessy, who was lying next to Martin, looked up. "Boss, you okay?"

Kurt glanced over at her, got tangled up in Sammy's leash and almost crashed right into Cody. "Dad! Watch out!"

It was too late, Cody and Sammy jumped out of the way as Kurt splashed head first into the deep end of the pool. Carey turned, saw Kurt pulling himself out of the pool and coming toward her, soaking wet, cheek bleeding and not looking terribly happy.

"Kurt, hello... Long time no see..." she backed up. "Please try not to go crazy..."

"A little late for that advice. What is going on? I haven't seen or heard from you in thirteen years and suddenly you're popping up everywhere I look and naturally on the day I'm-" Cody appeared at his Mother's side. "- Dad, I can explain why she's here."

"Zack, you know who this is?"

"Actually, yes. And actually I'm not Zack."

Zack appeared on Carey's other side. "I am."

Kurt looked from Cody to Zack, back to Cody, then to Carey. She's nodded. He was speechless. "Both of them? Cody... Zack..."

"I guess you and Mom sort of think alike, cause you both sent us to the same camp. We met and the whole thing kind of just spilled out." Zack smiled.

"They decided to switch places on us, Kurt."

"Wait a minute. You mean I've had Cody all this time?"

Cody nodded. "I wanted to know what you were like and Zack wanted to know Mom. Are you angry?"

It took a moment to sink in, then Kurt took Cody in his arms. "Honey, of course not. It's just... I can't believe it's you. The last time I saw you... you had diaper rash. Look at you..."

"Well, I'm quite grown up now and quite without a father."

"And I'm headed into my crazy mixed-up teenage years and I'll be the only boy I know without a mother to watch over him."

Kurt, was still trying to put it together. "Zack, you've been in London all this time?" Zack nodded. "Come here." He pulled Zack to him..

"Mom's amazing, Dad... I don't know how you ever let her go." Zack smiled.

"Boys, why don't you let your father and I talk for a couple of minutes, okay?"

The boys took off. Kurt grabbed a towel to dry his hair.

Zack grabbed his brothers hand and yanked him into the elevator. They road up to their floor and ran into one of the rooms. Zack quickly locked the door to the hall, and the door that joined the other room.

"I missed you, so much." he said as he pushed his smaller brother onto the bed.

"I missed you too." Cody smiled and blushed as Zack devoured his neck. "Are you sure now is a good time to be doing this?"

"Definitely." Zack pulled their shirts off and began kissing Cody's chest. Cody moaned and ran his fingers through Zack's hair as Zack ran his tongue along one of his nipples, nipping at it gently.

"Zack..." he groaned and lifted his knee slightly, applying pressure to Zack's groin.

The older twin moaned and rocked his growing erection on Cody's leg. Their lips locked and they kissed furiously. Cody shoved his tongue into Zack's mouth and lapped away, tasting every corner and every inch of his brothers mouth. Zack smiled against Cody's lips and nipped at his lip. They moaned in sync and began undoing their pants together. Zack pulled down Cody's zipper slowly and massaged the bulge in his pants. Cody undid Zack's pants as well and shoved him down onto the bed. The smaller blonde boy mounted him and attacked his neck.

"Will you go down on me?" Zack rubbed Cody's lower back as he spoke.

"What do you mean?"

"Uh... not really sure how to.. oh, well, you suck on my cock an-"

"Suck on your what?"

"Please?" Zack smiled and wiggled his pants off, his erection standing straight up.

Cody sighed, knowing that arguing with his brother would be pointless. He crawled down and took the member in his hand, gently stroking it.

"Don't be afraid."

"Shut up, I'm totally not afraid." Cody ran his tongue across the tip before taking it into his mouth and sucking.

Zack groaned and toyed with his hair, watching as Cody bobbed his head up and down. Cody smiled at the noises that were coming from his brother.

"Cody.." Zack moaned and rolled his hips, accidentally causing his brother to gag. "Sorry, little too excited.." Zack pulled his brother's head away and kissed him gently. "I love you."

"I love you too." Cody pulled his pants off the rest of the way and grabbed the complimentary travel size bottle of lotion, pouring it onto his fingers and Zack's moist cock.

Cody pressed two fingers to his entrance and slid them both inside. Zack moaned as he watched his brother scissor himself. Cody gasped as he found his sensitive spot and began pressing his fingers against it while moaning Zack's name. Zack smiled, his cock twitching between Cody's legs.

"Sit down on it." Zack smiled more.

Cody nodded and removed his fingers, wiping the excess lotion on the sheets. He gently lowered himself down onto Zack, taking the whole length inside of him. Cody gasped as his brother thrust into him deeply. Zack watched as his younger twin rocked his hips and toyed with himself. He admired the slim, girlish frame above him and he ran his hands up and down it as their hips fit together. Cody bent down, kissing his brother deeply. Zack rolled them over, messing up the blankets on the bed as he continued thrusting himself in and out of Cody. Cody screamed and wrapped his arms around Zack who was now biting his neck.

"Are you coming?" Zack asked, curious about his brother's breaking point.

"Soon.. What- about- you?" Cody gasped between words.

"Uh-huh..." Zack sat up, holding onto Cody's hips, lifting him off the bed and thrusting wildly.

Zack and Cody both moaned as their bodies connected, sharing the heat. They moaned together, coming at the same time and shuddering at the feeling of the electric charge that seemed to shoot through their bodies.

"That just seems to get better and better." Zack smiled and kissed Cody.

"Yes, it does." Cody returned the smile and wound his arms around Zack.

Meanwhile. "Oh, man, I can't believe this. Seeing them together... and you... and..." Kurt took a breath. "How are you, Care or does everyone call you Carey now?"

"No, no, Care is fine. My Dad still calls me Care. I've been terrific. How 'bout you?"

"Well, I've had better days." he touched his cheek, where blood was. "Ouch!"

"Let me help you with that?" she turned to a passing towel boy. "Excuse me, do you have a First-Aid kit?"

"Sure." he walked off to a supply closet.

"Okay, lie down..." Carey sat Kurt down in a lawn chair. Kurt lied down on the chair as the towel boy returned with a First Aid Kit. Carey sat beside him, tending to his cut.

Kurt looked up at her. "How is your Dad, still sneaking those stogies?" (a cheap cigar)

"Every day." they exchanged a smile.

"I can't believe it, you haven't changed at all..."

"You thought maybe I'd be fat and gray?" Carey frowned.

"Well, not grey..." Carey dabbed an extra amount of peroxide to his face. "Ouch!"

"- Finally! There you are!" Kurt and Carey turned, looking close enough to be kissing.

Meredith was taken aback. She was thrown by seeing them together. "Oh. You've met Carey. Good. Honey, Carey's going to make my... wedding gown... But, I don't understand... How did you two meet and why are you so wet?"

"I wasn't paying attention and I..." he turned to Carey. "You're making My fiance's wedding gown?"

"Kurt, I didn't know she was your fiance..."

"How did we meet? How did you two meet?" Kurt was confused.

"Am I missing something here?" Meredith said.

"Sweetheart, you know what? This is one small world..."

"How small?"

Cody strolled along and looked at Meredith. "Oh, hi, Mer."

"Hello."

Zack walked over, joining Cody. "How ya doin'?"

Meredith screamed at seeing double.

"Honey, did I ever mention Zack was a twin?"

"No, as a matter of fact, you didn't. Two of them? How fabulous."

"Don't feel bad, Mer, he never mentioned it to me, either. Imagine my surprise." Zack said.

"By the way, I'm the real Zack. This is Cody. He was just pretending to be me while I was in London pretending to be him. And this is our Mom, Carey Sprouse. By the way Dad, I want to change my name to Zack Sprouse-Martin."

"This is your mother?" Meredith asked.

"Yes." both boys answered.

Meredith turned to Carey. "You were married to Kurt?"

"Guilty again."

"Well, this is a small world."

"And getting smaller." Kurt said.

"And what a coincidence that we're all here on the same exact weekend."

"It's not exactly a coincidence. The children arranged it so their father and I could work out their custody situation." Carey said. The boys smiled.

"The children arranged it? Oh. How sweet." Meredith said, trying to cover up her sarcasm and disgust.


	10. Chapter 10

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters. I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

**Hello love! Lol. Quick chapter. Lot on my mind, don't feel much like writing...  
**

Kurt and Meredith were browsing in Tiffany for rings. "I'm sorry, I just don't see why you have to have dinner with your ex-wife with her little 'Mary Poppin's accent. Why couldn't you just meet her in the lobby, discuss the custody, shake hands and say good-bye? I'll tell you why - because your sons don't want me to marry you."

"That's not true."

Meredith turned to a sales woman. "Can we have some help over here, please?" she turned back to Kurt. "It's totally true. They see me as the, evil step-mother. Trust me, I'm not being paranoid. Those boys have something up their sleeve... Can I try on the emerald cut please? No, the bigger one... The biggest one."

"Honey, calm down. The boys have never had a meal with both their parents in their entire lives. How could I say no?"

Meredith lightened up as she slipped on a ring. "I told you to let me represent you on all your negotiations, didn't I?" she showed him the ring. "This is incredible. What do you think?"

"I think I have to get dressed for dinner."

Meredith whined. "Kurty..."

"If you love it. I love it."

She threw her arms around him. "I love it."

Later that night, Kurt and Zack exited their room, both dressed to the nines. A limo waited by the curb. "Zack, I've had enough surprises for one day... just tell me where we're going..."

"You're gonna love it, Dad, trust me."

Just then, Carey and Cody stepped out of the hotel. Carey was wearing the red dress Martin recommended. Kurt tried not to admire her too openly.

"Hey... Hi." he smiled.

"Hi. So do you know where they're taking us?"

"He won't crack."

As they crossed to the limo, Cody handed them eye shades. "Okay, now put these on. You can take them off when we reach our destination."

"We're going in a limo?" Kurt asked.

"You want one of us to drive?" Zack smiled and looked at the worry in his fathers face. "Please, indulge us."

A foghorn sounded, as the limo pulled to a stop in a dark street. The boys hurried out.

"Okay, you can take them off." Cody stole a quick kiss from Zack before allowing his parents to remove their blindfolds.

Kurt and Carey stepped from the limo, taking off their blindfolds. Their eyes widened as they looked ahead and saw an exquisite 150 foot yacht, all lit up and bobbing gently in the sparkling bay.

"She's ours for the night." Zack smirked.

"And exactly how are we paying for her?" Kurt questioned.

"Zack and I pooled our allowances." Kurt and Carey looked at him doubtfully. "Okay, Grandfather pitched in a bit." they continued looking at him. "Okay, he pitched in a lot."

Kurt and Carey exchanged a quizzical look, as they followed the boys down the steps to the deck, where a uniformed Captain welcomed them aboard. "Okay folks, right this way..."

Zack and Cody opened a pair of double doors. "Ta da'!" Zack shouted.

Right in front of them, they saw a romantic dining room where a candle-lit table was set for two. The windows reveal the San Francisco Bay, lit by the yacht's twinkling lights.

"The table's only set for two." Kurt noticed.

"That's the other part of the surprise we're not joining you." Cody said.

"You're not?"

The boys smiled and shook their heads as Chessy entered, dressed as a ship's Steward, in tropical white. "No, but I am. Good evening, I'm Chessy, I'll be your server tonight. No wisecracks please."

At that moment, out stepped Martin, also dressed in ship's whites and was carrying a bottle of champagne. "And I'm Martin, your Sommelier. May I offer you both a taste of the bubbly in hopes that you'll get a little snickered and won't can this lovely lady and myself for following the orders of two thirteen year-olds..."

"Cody, mood music, if you please." Chessy said.

Cody pushed a few buttons and the lights dimmed. Moonlight spilled into the room as Sade's Smooth Operator played over the cabin's speakers.

"Relax... Sail through time..." Cody said as if he were a hypnotist.

"- Back to yesteryear..." Zack smiled and began walking backwards with Cody.

The boys disappeared behind double doors, leaving Kurt and Carey looking thoroughly confused. Chessy approached with a tray of hors d'oeuvres. "You don't get it, do you? Smooth Operator...'Big hit in '86 ... The year you two met... Hors d'oeuvre?" she offered.

"So, that's what this is all about." Kurt noticed a life raft with a homemade sign that said QE2 hanging on the wall. "They're recreating the night we met … The boat... the music ..."

Chessy pointed to herself. "The help."

Carey was a little misty eyed, "It's incredibly sweet."

"Martin, I think I'll have that drink." Martin poured them both champagne, then he and Chessy slipped away. "To tell you the truth, I haven't been on a boat since the QE2." Kurt admitted.

"Neither have I." a soft wind blew Carey's hair.

Taken with her, Kurt lifted his glass. "Well then, here's to..."

Finishing his sentence, Carey picked up her own glass. "Our sons."

Not exactly what Kurt was thinking, but he nodded and agreed. "To our sons."

Through a porthole, Zack and Cody took a peek, thrilled to see their Parents toasting.

"You know, I always see you in Zack. I always have. Something about his eyes ..."

"That's funny. I always see you in Cody." she smiled softly. At an awkward moment, they each sipped their champagne. As they glanced over at the porthole, the boys dropped out of sight.

"Now I know how a goldfish feels." Kurt laughed slightly. "They turned out pretty good though, huh?"

"We've been lucky."

"Sometime, if we're ever really alone maybe we could talk about... what happened between us. It all feels a bit hazy to me now... It ended so fast."

"It started so fast."

"Now that part I remember perfectly."

Through another porthole, Chessy and Martin watched. "Looks like things are heating up nicely. I'd say it's safe to serve the vichyssoise." Martin said.

"You ladle, I'll serve."

They started back toward the galley, side by side. It was a tight, they tried to pass one another but got momentarily stuck, their eyes locked, then they squeezed past each other.

"Yes, I'll ladle." Martin said, pulling himself together.

"Right. And I'll..."

"Serve."

"Right."

"So, you've done incredibly well. Your dream of owning your own vineyard... it actually came true." Carey twirled her finger around her glass.

"Hey, how about you, always drawing on napkins and corners of newspapers? Singing loudly in the shower and humming at inappropriate times. Now you're this major designer and singer... pretty impressive."

"Yeah, it's amazing. We both actually got where we wanted to go..."

"Yep. We did."

Chessy entered, carrying two bowls of soup and placed them in front of Carey and Kurt.

"So, what do we do about the boys?"

Carey thought for a second. "Well, I guess now that they've met, we can't very well keep them apart. I could keep them half the year and you could-"

"- Guys, they can't go to two schools every year." Chessy interrupted.

"I agree." Kurt nodded.

"Okay, I could keep them for a whole year, then you could-"

"- Care, this is why we..." he turned to Chessy.

"Sorry. Ignore me. I'm gone." she backed out of the room.

"This is why we came up with the solution we have." Kurt said.

"Really? I thought it was because we decided never to see each other again."

"Not we Care..."

"You know that part's become a bit hazy for me too over the years."

"You don't remember the day you packed?"

"No, that day I remember perfectly. Did I hurt you when I threw that suitcase? I've often wondered."

Kurt rubbed his shoulder. "Let's put it this way, I'll never pitch for the Yankees." he started his soup and stopped. "So how come you never got married again? I always figured by now you'd be re-married with a new family..."

"Me? No... no, no... no..."

"That's a lot of no's.."

"That's because I realized a long time ago marriage wasn't for me..."

A beat of silence and Kurt began to eat again, then stopped. "You know I may be alone with you again, so... About the day you packed... Why did you do it?"

"Kurt, we were getting along so badly, we found out we each had tempers, we said foolish things... So I packed... Got on my first 747 and... you didn't come after me." Dead silence.

"..I didn't know I was supposed to."

"Well, it really doesn't matter now... Let's put on a good face for the kids, shall we and get this show on the road..." Carey looked at her watch. "Gosh, I'm still on London time, so..."

"Okay. Yeah. You're right. Let's get the show on the road." Carey started her soup with Kurt joining her, not a word passing between them.

Cody and Zack watched before slipping away from the porthole and running across the ship, finding an empty bedroom. Zack smirked, leading his brother into the bathroom.

"Shower time!" Zack laughed.

"In the shower? Really?" Cody folded his arms and frowned slightly. "How come I'm the one that never gets to pick where and how we do it?"

"Because you're the girl?" Zack laughed and undressed his brother and himself.

Hot water ran down their bodies as they were pressed against the cold tile wall of the shower. Zack's hands caressed Cody's backside as they ground their hips together. The smaller framed boy wrapped his arms up under Zack's, holding onto him and pulling their chests closer together. The water shone off of their bodies, adding to the moment. Zack's tongue ran up his brothers arm and to his neck, kissing it gently. Cody moaned, gripping Zack's hair and wrapping one leg around his hip.

"Fuck me.." Cody moaned and tried to contain his giggles as Zack roughly lifted his other leg up and held him closely.

"What's so funny?" Zack smiled, kissing his brother.

"Just that we're doing this.." Cody smiled and held on tightly to his lover. "Now fuck me."

"Yes sir." Zack thrust gently into Cody and held him in his arms.

They moaned together, rocking their hips in sync. Zack smiled at the pleasurable faces his brother made.

"You like that, right?" Zack kissed his neck and worked his way to his brothers lips, not giving him a chance to answer.

Cody moaned into Zack's mouth and tightened himself around Zack's throbbing cock.

"Oh fuck." Zack bit onto Cody's shoulder. "Don-d- ah...Don't do that to me, Cody."

"I'm sorry, what did I do? Did I hurt you or something?" Cody became confused.

"No, ah no.. it didn't hurt. Just felt really good and will make me finish too quickly."

"Oh." Cody smiled and kissed Zack deeply.

Their lips worked slowly and they enjoyed the warm, sweet taste of each others mouths. Zack's hips moved faster, thrusting deeply into Cody. Cody gasped and shivered every time his brother brushed up against his spot. Cody could feel the heat building in his groin as he neared his climax.

"Z-Z-Zack!" Cody screamed as he came.

"Oh fuck." Zack thrust deeper and came inside of Cody. "Shit..." he sighed and brushed the wet hair from Cody's face.

"What's wrong?"

"Was a little too quick for my taste."

"I'm sorry." Cody kissed Zack and jumped off his hips. "Ouch."

Zack smiled and placed another kiss on Cody's lips. They tried to pull apart, but their lockets had become tangled together. They giggled simultaneously and just held each other under the hot water for a few minutes.

"I suppose we should untangle our necklaces and check on mom and dad.." Cody whispered.

"I suppose." Zack smiled and reached behind Cody, turning the water off.


	11. Chapter 11

***I do not own Suite Life on Deck/of Zack and Cody or any of the characters. I also do not own The Parent Trap.**

**I think this is the longest chapter? Hmmmm  
**

Carey signed her bill and turned to Martin who was tipping the Bellman. "All set then. Where's Cody?"

"I just called, he's on his way down."

Kurt and Chessy joined them, everyone's spirits were low. "Okay, so I'll uh... send Zack back to you over Christmas."

"And I'll see that Cody spends Easter with you."

The elevator opened and Zack and Cody stepped off, holding hands, dressed identically in T-shirts and overalls. It was impossible to tell them apart.

Kurt turned to Cody. "This one's Zack, I'm positive."

Zack grinned at him. "I hope you're right, Dad. You wouldn't want to send the wrong kid all the way back to England."

Kurt looked to Carey, he couldn't be sure.

Cody piped up. "Here's our proposition. We go back to Dad's house, pack our stuff and the four of us leave on the camping trip."

"The four of us!" Carey gaped.

"And when you bring us back, we'll tell you who's Zack and who's Cody."

"Or... You do as we say and I take one of you back with me to London whether you like or not." Carey folded her arms.

That afternoon a 747 was soaring into the sky, luckily though, four sleeping bags were being tossed into the trunk of Kurt's suburban. Kurt threw in the final bag as Meredith watched, wearing a tight suit and sunglasses.

"What am I supposed to do for three days sit home and knit?" she whined.

Carey exited the house looking as if she was ready for a safari, carrying a backpack.

"Excuse me, what is she doing here?" Meredith frowned.

"That was the deal - the four of us go together." Kurt continued putting things in the trunk.

"What are you suddenly, the Brady Bunch? This is ridic-"

Carey walked over. "- Hi, Meredith." she viewed the annoyed look she held. "Everything okay?"

"Well, no, as a matter of fact, it isn't. I didn't realize you were going on this little outing and to tell you the truth, I'm not so sure I am okay with it."

"I agree. The ex-wife in the next sleeping bag is a little weird..." Carey smiled.

"Thank you."

"I insist you come with us, really." Meredith stopped cold.

"Care ..."

"Kurt, I messed-up up your entire weekend, it's the least I can do to pay you back."

Cody and Zack exited the house with Chessy. As the kids climbed into the car, they noticed their mother and Meredith come out of the house. Meredith was now dressed in tight black work-out gear.

"Dad, what's Meredith doing here?" Zack asked.

Kurt got behind the wheel. "Your mother invited her. Be nice."

The boys looked at each other, then to Chessy, as Meredith smiled and climbed into the front seat.

Carey closed the doors. "Okay. Have fun everybody."

"Care, what are you doing?" Kurt asked.

"I really think you and Meredith need time alone before the big day."

"Mom! Come on, that's not the plan." Cody shouted.

"Honestly, you'll have much more fun without me."

Meredith began having second thoughts. "Look, if you're not going... I don't have to go... Trust me, I'm not exactly a big nature girl."

"But this'll be your chance to really get to know the boys... Starting next week, they're half yours."

Kurt caught Carey's eye and she blew him a kiss.

"Have fun yall'!"

As the car pulled off, Chessy turned to Carey. "I would pay to see that woman climb a mountain."

As far as the eye could see, there was a vista of terrain. Zack and Cody were climbing a steep hill, wearing back-packs and baseball caps. They were followed by Meredith who was puffing and perspiring, and dabbing sunscreen on her nose as she tried to keep her balance. Kurt brought up the rear. Meredith plopped down on a rock, trying to catch her breath.

"I'm gonna kill my trainer... He says I'm in such great shape..." she rubbed her legs. "I can't believe people actually do this for fun."

"Boys, hold on, we're stopping." Kurt shouted.

Zack trudged back toward them. "Again? Dad, at this rate, it'll take three days just to get up the mountain."

"Meredith isn't used to the altitude... Just chill, okay?"

Behind Kurt and Meredith, Cody was slipping large rocks into Meredith's Prada Backpack.

"Somebody hand me my Evian... I can't move."

Cody spotted a large tarantula, grabbed it carefully and placed it on top of Meredith's water bottle. "Here you go, Mer."

Meredith took the bottle, lifted it to her mouth and found herself eye to _eyes _with a large harry spider. She screamed, tossing the Evian bottle in the air, losing her balance and slipping off the rock.

"Honey, you okay?"

Zack caught the spider. "This little guy was on her Evian bottle, I guess." he held the spider by the middle. "He won't hurt you, Mer.. and they taste good!" he went to pretend to place the spider in his mouth and received a stern look from Cody.

Meredith screamed again. "Get it away from me! I hate things that! That's so gross!"

"Okay." Zack handed the spider to Cody who walked behind Meredith and gently deposited the spider right on top of her head.

"Why don't I take the lead, you two help Meredith." Kurt stood up and began walking off.

Meredith rose, still not knowing the spider sat on top of her head. Zack smiled and hummed The Itsy Bitsy Spider quietly, causing Cody to giggle.

"Sure, you're going to help me... right over a cliff, you'll help me." she glared at the boys.

Zack turned to Cody. "Not a bad idea. See any cliffs?"

Meredith groaned as she lifted her much heavier backpack.

"Need a hand?" Cody asked.

Meredith pulled away. "Not from you, thank you. Don't think I can't see right past those angelic faces. One more trick from you two and I promise I'll make your lives miserable from the day I say 'I do'. Got it?"

"Got it, Cruella." Zack nudged Cody.

"What'd you call me?"

"Nothing. Not a thing..." he quieted his voice. "Cruella." he then turned back. "Oh, Mer... I think there's something on your head..."

The boys walked ahead as Meredith reached up and felt her hair... then her hand landed on the spider. She screamed a blood-curtailing scream and the spider panicked and ran down her face and right into her shirt. She screamed more, and dropped her back-pack while whipping her shirt off and throwing the spider on the ground. Kurt and the boys ran back to her.

"Are you okay? What happened?"

Bright red from anger, embarrassment from standing in her bra, and in shock, Meredith stomped her foot and pointed to Cody and Zack.

"What did we do, Dad? We were with you." Cody asked.

Later on the trail, Meredith walked by herself, banging the buttons on her cell phone. "Please work... Hello? Hello?" Meredith stopped when she saw Cody and Zack bent over examining something on the ground. Meredith snuck up behind them and overheard their conversation.

Cody turned to Zack. "I didn't know they had mountain lions up here."

"Oh yeah, the place is crawling with them." he winked at Cody. "An old Indian guide once showed me how to keep them away." Zack picked up two sticks and hit them together making a weird noise. "Woo woo woo! Just do this and they'll never come near you."

The boys picked up sticks and moved off down the trail, clacking them together. Meredith stooped, picked up two sticks and clacked them together, following, making the weird noise.

Kurt, the boys and Meredith sat around the campfire. Everyone ate trout, except Meredith, who sat on a rock, wrapped in a blanket, swatting at mosquitoes and rubbing lotion on her arm.

"You sure you don't want some trout, Mom? Is that okay, by the way? If we start calling you Mom?" Cody turned to Meredith.

"I think your mother would prefer if you called me Meredith and no thank you, I do not eat trout... for the thousandth time. I'll wait until breakfast. What are we having?"

"Trout." the trio said.

"We always live off the trail up here, it's part of the experience." Kurt said.

Meredith continued swatting mosquitoes. "What's the other part, being eaten to death by mosquitoes?" she swatted another one and looked at her bug spray. "You'd think they actually liked this stuff."

"What is that you're using?" Kurt looked at the bottle and put some on his hands. "You're going to attract every mosquito on the mountain. This is sugar and water... Where'd you get this stuff?"

Meredith looked to the boys, who made themselves busy by eating.

"That's it. I'm taking a large sleeping pill and going to bed." Meredith picked up her two sticks and whacked them together as she moved off toward her tent making strange noises.

"Sweetheart, what are you doing?"

"I don't want the mountain lions to..." she turned to the twins then back to Kurt. "-There are no mountain lions up here, are there?"

Kurt shook his head. Meredith glared at the boys, dropped her sticks in the fire, walked to Kurt and gives him a luscious kiss goodnight, smiled at the boys and marched off to her tent.

"I'm telling you guys, lay off. This isn't her thing, okay? I'm not marrying her because she's Annie Oakley."

"Who's Annie Oakley?" Cody asked.

"Just cool it." Kurt sighed.

Everything was quiet around midnight as an owl hooted in the distance. Zack rolled over in his tent and looked at Cody who was wide awake.

"You alright?" he smiled and kissed his twins cheek.

"Dandy." Cody smiled and undid his sleeping bag, crawling over to Zack. "I'm cold, though."

"Guess I'll just have to warm you up." Zack whispered and got out of his own sleeping bag, laying Cody down gently. Their lips met and they kissed softly. Cody nipped at Zack's lip and helped him remove their clothes. Zack moaned quietly at the heat in Cody's mouth as he stuffed his cock into the moist cavern. Cody groaned around the throbbing member and sucked slowly. The smaller boy wiggled his tongue and smiled up at his twin who was trying his hardest to stay upright, but couldn't, and wound up falling over onto their sleeping bags. Cody removed his brother from his mouth and crawled on top of him. Zack shook his head no and grinned, shoving Cody onto his stomach.

"What in the world do you think you're doing?" Cody tried to turn over but was held down by Zack, who was much stronger than he was.

"Fucking you." Zack poured some sun lotion on his fingers and slid two of them into Cody, scissoring him slowly.

"Nng- ah..." Cody bit his lip and arched his hips off of the ground.

"Shh, keep it down." Zack whispered, placing his hand over Cody's mouth as he slowly entered him. Zack sighed and leaned down, placing his face into the crook of Cody's neck, planting small butterfly kisses on his pulse. Cody ripped his nails along the sleeping bags, trying to contain any noises that wanted to escape his lips.

"Zacky, I'm gonna scream.." Cody whispered. "It feels so good.." he opened his mouth to scream, but Zack violently turned his brothers head and kissed him, to smother the scream that nearly slipped out.

"No screaming." Zack smiled and thrust deeper inside of Cody, placing one hand on Cody's hip and the other on the ground to brace himself. Zack could feel Cody's heart beating at the thrill of getting caught, or maybe his was just pounding twice as hard..But either way, they were having fun and for all they knew this could have been the last time they were going to be alone like this together for quite some time. Cody gasped and rolled his hips backwards, gaining more contact from his brother who was now thrusting as hard as he could into the smaller framed boy.

"You're so tight." Zack smiled and began kissing his brother again. Cody kissed back, smiling and moaning into his mouth. Their tongues twisted together and they rolled over, their positions switching. Cody straddled Zack's hips and moved fast, up and down, causing his brother to squirm and moan beneath him. Zack watched as Cody neared his peak and ran one hand up and down his body, while sucking on the fingers of his other hand. The two moaned together while Cody's final movement did them both in. Zack held tightly onto Cody's hips and thrust up deeply while Cody slammed his hips down, collapsing onto his brother a few seconds later.

"Wow.." they said together and smiled. Zack held Cody in his arms and toyed with his hair.

"Hey, come with me."

The boys snuck out of their tent and tiptoed over to Meredith's tent. They stepped inside, seeing Meredith fast asleep on her air mattress. They positioned themselves at Meredith's head and feet and on the "count of three", they lifted her up on her mattress. Cody wobbled as did Zack. When they carried her out, Meredith moved her arm, brushing her hand across Zack's nose. Zack twitched his nose but kept going.

The boys stepped out of the tent then down a path to the lake-front, where they quietly dragged the air mattress into the lake, nodded to each other and pushed her mattress off.

"Sweet dreams, Mommy Dearest." Zack smirked, taking his brother hand and walking back to their tent where they laid together, cuddling.

"Should have done that before we had sex..." Cody yawned and pressed his face into Zack's chest.

"Yeah...Sorry." Zack kissed his temple and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep.

As the sun rose, Meredith was sound asleep on her back in the middle of the lake. She flopped an arm into the water.

"That feels so nice..." she said, while asleep. She gently moved her fingers in the water, then her eyes sprung open. She looks straight up as a bird flapped its wings and flew across her face. Meredith screamed, sat up, realized she was in the middle of the lake. She screamed again, her voice echoing off the mountains.

"Kuurrrt!"

Kurt stuck his head out of his tent, half-asleep, spotted Meredith thrashing around and screaming, in the middle of the lake.

"What's she doing in the lake?"

Zack and Cody peeked out of their tent and saw Meredith splashing back to the shore in her soaking wet pajamas. She stormed past the campfire, kicked the coffee pot into the air and marches up to Kurt.

"What's going on?" Kurt questioned.

"Here's what's going on, buddy, the day we say I do" is the day I ship those brats off to Switzerland. Get the picture? It's me or them. Take your pick." she stomped her foot and folded her arms.

"Them."

"Excuse me?" she screeched.

"T-H-E-M." Kurt spelled. "Get the picture?"

Back at Kurt's house, Carey sat on a rocker on the front porch, reading when she heard Kurt and the Boys pull up.

She rose to greet them. "Back so soon? Did you have fun?"

"Not exactly." Cody said.

"We've been punished through the end of the century." Zack continued.

"Starting now. Go." Zack pointed.

"Where's Meredith?" Carey asked.

"We played a couple of harmless tricks on her and she kinda freaked out a little." Zack scratched his head.

"A little?" Kurt took out a ring, showing Carey. "We broke up."

"Oh, jeez ... This-is all my fault. If I hadn't suggested she go..." Carey frowned.

"- Tricked her would be more like it. Like mother, like sons..."

"I'm really sorry, Kurt."

"We are too, Dad... really." Cody said.

"Will you forgive us?" Zack asked.

"Up to your room!" when they were gone, he smiled. "I gotta remember to thank them one day."

"You're relieved?"

"I think I am...I'm also starving... Chessy around?"

"She and Martin went off on a picnic around noon... yesterday."

"Hopefully they'll be back... soonish... Who would've thought my Nanny and your Butler..." he shook his head. "So, listen, how 'bout I whip us up something to eat?"

"You know how to cook now?"

"Of course, I know how to cook. I can make pasta... and pasta... and..."

"Pasta sounds good."

Later that evening, Kurt, now clean shaven and wearing fresh clothes, passed the boy's room. Inside, Zack and Cody were changing into pajamas and getting into bed.

"Wow! You look so nice, where are you going?" Zack asked.

Kurt shut their door. "Good night, gentlemen!"

Moments later in the kitchen, Carey set the table as Kurt entered the room.

"Smells good in here."

"Really? I'm just boiling water."

"Oh. Then it must be you..." he took out two wine glasses. "So what are you in the mood for, red or white?"

"I think red."

"Follow me..." Kurt led Carey to a stone stairwell that led down to Kurt's private wine cellar. It was a cavernous space lit by beautiful lanterns, the walls were lined with bottles of wine... ladders leaned against the walls, library style. "This is where I keep my private stash. Did you know I also collect wine?"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, I'm a man of limited interests."

Carey laughed. Nick led her into a small cozy room and pulled a bottle from a rack.

"Here's a 1921 Burgundy... They say the rain that year made this the best Burgundy ever harvested... Oh wait, you'll appreciate this one..." he showed her another bottle.

Carey read the label. "Vi Day, 1946... incredible."

"Yeah, I love that..." he showed her another bottle. "The same wine my parents served at their wedding... a 152 Bordeaux. I think my sister was conceived off this baby."

"What's this-one?" she read the label. "Where Dreams Have No End... 1983."

"That one actually took me years to track down."

"Why, where's it from?"

"It's the wine we drank at our wedding. I now have every bottle ever made."

Carey was completely thrown. "You do?"

"I do."

"Can we open one?"

"You're the only one I'd drink it with." Kurt pulled a bottle from the shelf and dusted it off. He looked at Carey and saw that her eyes were teary. "You okay?"

"Just got a little dust in my eye..."

"I can offer you a clean sleeve to..."

She pulled back from the offer. "No, no, I'm fine, now. Really. All better."

"You don't always have to be so brave, you know."

"Oh, but I do, actually..." just then, they heard the cellar door open above them and footsteps.

"Anybody home?" Chessy shouted.

Kurt hesitated and looked to Carey, who shrugged.

"Yeah... We're on our way up..." Kurt said.

Kurt and Carey climbed the stairs and entered the kitchen where they were greeted by Martin and Chessy. Martin wore shades and a Laker baseball cap.

"Welcome back... How was the picnic?" Carey asked.

"Who knew the man wanted to eat in L.A.? We drove eight hours to have a picnic in a city with no parks."

"But what a town! I saw mountains, beaches, I saw Michael Keaton, not to mention I found out I have the same hand size as John Wayne and the same shoe size as John Barrymore."

"The man is a lot to handle... but a lot of fun. How was the camping trip? Aren't you back early? Are we interrupting anything? We are. Let's go, Marty."

"No, no, you're not interrupting anything. Are you hungry? In the mood for some pasta?" Carey asked.

Kurt looked at Carey, wishing she hadn't invited them to stay.

"You don't mind? We haven't eaten since Hearst Castle."

"No, no, it's fine."

"I'll set the table for two more..." as Chessy and Martin joined them, Kurt slipped the bottle of wine into a cabinet and closed the door.

Lined up in front of Kurt's house was a row of suitcases. Carey came down the front steps and joined Cody and Martin, who were dressed and ready to go.

"Okay, then, I guess that's that. We're really off this time." Carey said.

Kurt, Zack, Chessy and Sammy watched sadly as a cab driver loaded the baggage into the trunk. The boys hugged and kissed, promising to see each other over Thanksgiving. Chessy and Martin hugged and promise to see each other over Christmas... Kurt and Carey then hugged in a distant way and quickly let go.

"Take care of yourself." Kurt said to Carey.

"You too."

The trunk is closed and Carey hugged Zack hard... Kurt hugged Cody. Carey, Cody and Martin waved, then ducked into the cab. As the taxi pulled off, Chessy, Zack and Sammy all looked up to Kurt; he turned away...

A Taxi rounded a corner and pulled up in front of Carey's town house. Carey and Cody entered, dropping their bags by the front door.

"Hi ... We're home."

"Grandfather?" Cody called out.

"I'll check his study."

Carey entered the study, and sure enough, there he was, sitting behind the desk, hidden behind The Financial Times.

"Hey stranger..."

The paper came down and Carey saw that it was Zack sitting behind the desk.

"Hi, Mom. Did you know the Concorde gets you here in half the time?"

Carey, stunned, spoke. "Yeah, I've heard that..."

Cody arrived in the door behind Carey, shocked to see Zack.

"What are you doing here?"

"It took us around thirty seconds after you left to realize we didn't want to lose you two again." Zack smiled and winked at Cody.

"We?" Carey questioned.

Kurt walked in the doorway behind Zack. "We. I made the mistake of not coming after you once, Carey and I wasn't going to do it again... no matter how brave you are."

Carey looked across the study at Kurt, her eyes once again filling up, a smile on her face. "Thank you." they stood frozen, their eyes locked on each other.

"Pssst..." Cody signaled for Zack to join him in the hall.

Zack rushed up to Cody. "We did it! We did it!" they kissed deeply and pulled apart, resting their foreheads together.

"It's unbelievable."

"Oh my God, you guys are gonna love living in California..."

"What do you mean ... California? You two are going to love living in London..."

"London?"

Carey and Kurt embraced each other by the window in the study, while Martin and Chessy hugged outside in the yard. Zack smiled, brushing off the conversation with his brother, kissing him deeply and pulling him off to their room.

**Hey oh! Final chapter. Meh. Good thing, I have other stuff to do.. ;) I know with this one I could have added more of a twist to it to make it orig. but..eh, I was being very lazy. haha.**


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